Under Fire
▶ Listen to this episodeCharacters Present
Episode Transcript Auto-generated, lightly formatted
This transcript is machine-generated and may contain errors in names, terminology, or attribution.
(coughing) - Peacocks. - This summer, during the biggest sporting event of the year, Peacock turns to two broadcasting legends for the Olympics coverage you can't find anywhere else. - Um, I think they mean us. - Oh, (beep) Um, (clears throat) - With an incredible duo sure to take home the comedy gold. Olympic highlights with Kevin Hart and Kenan Thompson. New episodes Monday, Wednesday and Friday, only on Peacock. (dramatic music) - You're the Marine? - Yeah, you're the ex-con. - Yeah, I did time, but you only gotta cast aspersions at me. - From the director of Mr. and Mrs.
Smith and The Bourne Identity comes a new film. - It's your first job? - I know what I'm doing. - It's a little late for a crit change. - Starring Matt Damon. - Everybody in New England is after us. - And Casey Affleck. - Go, go, go, go, go! - What are you doing? - Taking notes. - Taking notes on a criminal conspiracy. - The Instigators, rated R. Streaming August 9th on Apple TV+. - Hello, everybody. You are listening to the Dungeons and Randomness podcast. Please feel free to go to iTunes, find us and give us a five star rating and a lovely little review there.
Just to remind you that you can still be entered into the draw to win an Xbox One, providing you are headed to our Patreon. Also, we are all on Twitter, so go and follow us there. The main account is @dandrpodcast. And feel free to swing by the forums and say some nice things about the episodes and everything else. Thank you very much. Enjoy the episode. - Let's do that thing where we go around the table. I'm Jason, I'm the Dungeon Master Corner and the tables start with Izzy. - Hey, I'm Izzy and I play Una, the half-elf paladin. - And Kat. - Hi, I'm Kat Charlie and I play Fi, the changeling thief.
- And Mac. - Hey, I'm Mac and I play Kaluna Volgaris, the wildling shaman. - And Bree. - Hi, I'm Rianna and I play Jadzia Grace, the human warlock. - Okay, last time on the show, group three and Una reunited in Esterholdt and you got caught up on the things that had happened in Odyssea with the dragon and Una's death and her coming back. You found out that she is having a bit of crisis of faith right now and in the midst of that, Julie from the temple visited and there was a bit of a throw down in Jadzia's house. As a result, Julie was beaten and her paladins sort of drug her off and we'll see what happens as a result of that.
I remember Una carved up her armor a bit and sort of added insult to injury. So we're gonna see what happens as a result of that. Somewhere down the line, I imagine, but right now, let's pick up with a party in the house and before you guys take off, is there anything you wanna do in Esterholdt before you hop on the dragon and leave for the Overwatch? - Nope. - Thinking. I don't think so. The only thing we really have to deal with in Esterholdt right now is bitchy mare, but we'll take care of her later. She's even still alive after the dragon. We didn't even chat, did we?
- Bigger fish of fry. - Probably not a consequence. (laughing) - Probably nothing going on there. So I guess Kaluna will walk up to Valus, whatever he's doing, and they'll take the dagger off of their harness thing and they'll hold it out to him. - Valus will reach out and take it from you and there's a moment's hesitation when Kaluna pulls the dagger just because that was mentioned so long ago that for just half a second, he thinks that you're pulling a knife on him. Just 'cause that's where his head goes. It's like, well, that's what I would do. But it's just the briefest of seconds.
Okay, that's fine. And then he reaches out and takes it from Kaluna. And a second is gonna go by and he's gonna reach for the dagger that's always on his side and he is going to pull it out, look at it, and then after a moment, he's gonna hand it to Kaluna. - Kaluna will take it. How big is this dagger? - Okay, as daggers, it's more of a short sword than a dagger, honestly. Yeah, the silver dagger that you handed him is slightly smaller than the one that he's carrying. That one's more, it's girthy, it's big. While it wouldn't be ridiculous for Kaluna to wield, it's almost a short sword for her.
- I guess Kaluna would probably give it like a couple of swings just because it's so big, just to get a feel for it. - I think Kaluna should have to roll and see if she stabs Alice. - Yeah, this is more a thing to him. Like it's an awkward, like he doesn't really know what to say about it. And he knows it's kind of a sore spot for you because that's the last thing you have for Merrick. So it's like, well, I'll let you hold this then. That's the thing. Yes, I did describe it as girthy. I did, I don't know why. - It's the worst fucking thing. Like it's a sword, swords aren't girthy.
- I don't know. - They're kind of sword is. - Like, I mean, it's got mass to it. It's got weight, it's thick. - There you go, it's massive. - Okay. - It is large. - But once you put your head in the mindset of dicks, that's the thing. I wasn't putting my head in the mindset of dicks is, that's the thing. - I don't know, you can't really describe something that's like long as girthy and like, there's no way to say that. - No, you're right. Again, I wasn't, I mean, I forgot who I was with. I should not, I mean, like it's my fault. - Anyone who thought about dicks.
- All right, I'm taking full blame. - My dog would have been like dicks. (all laughing) - Objects can be girthy and not dicks. - No, just stop saying that word. - Girth. - It's like the word moist. I mean, it's just, it's. - Okay, but moist does not necessarily imply vagina. - But like, okay, but no, but, okay, let's say you have a delicious fish taco and someone describes it. (all laughing) And it is definitely a fish taco. There is nothing like vagina-y about it. Until someone describes it as moist and then you're like, oh yeah, that is a really phallic food you're eating right there.
- Okay, that's fair. - Same thing with a sword. You shove it into people, like. - Totally. - It's like, you call it girthy. - Yeah, really though. - Really. - Totally, and I'm taking full blame. I'm taking full blame. - Wow, this taco is really moist and fishy. And warm and tight. It's like, okay, what? - Okay, if you describe your taco as tight, there's a problem, hold on. - That's the fucking point. The word's never girthy. - I like to stick my tongue into the taco and move around a lot. 'Cause that's how I eat tacos. And then you get mad at other people for being like, are you talking about vaginas?
- I'm just saying, I think girthy is slightly more on point than you describing a taco as tight. There's no, there is, no, you can describe, nevermind. Okay, it doesn't matter. - Yeah, I don't see a, well, I guess if you like wrapped it really tightly, like if it were a soft shell taco, you could like wrap it really tight. - Or it's tight, meaning cool. - Oh, come on. Tight, meaning cool. Taco is tight, dog. - Does tight ever mean cool? - No. - Yes, oh. - Yeah. - It's the only word you can use for cool. - That shit's tight, son. - Wait, is the reason that meant cool because of vaginas?
- Oh. - Oh. - Well, we cracked the code guys, we can go now. - Slang hacked. - Can we, can we get on with? - No, as long as you promise never to say girthy ever again in your life. - I promise. - Okay, we're fine. - I'm gonna try to use it every conversation with Izzy in that one. - Burn the world down. - So I guess you guys are saddling up and taking off then? - Sure. - Yeah. - All right. - About this dragon. - Yes. - Should we bring it to Overwatch? Should we bring her to Overwatch? 'Cause like- - It's either that or you're going on foot. - Well, I wanna go, but like, should we do the same thing where it's like, okay, let's find a place to park a few miles away.
- Yeah, I think- - Like when your parents see, parents are embarrassing and you make them like stop a half block before you reach the school. - Yeah, I think that is the case for sure. - I'm always worried about laying her out of her sight though. What if the poor thing gets stolen? Like Appa, we have to go on a huge quest to get her back. - Appa was a wooly mammoth thing though. She is a ice dragon the size of a city. - Okay. - If whoever steals Amara deserves it. - She's not going anywhere. She doesn't want to go. - Yeah, exactly. No one's taken her against her will.
- Okay, fair enough. - So do me a favor. Approaching Amara, are you gonna say anything to her? - Just hop on. - Okay bitch. - Or just jump on. - I'm just gonna smack her in the face. - Okay, cool. - Do what I say, bitch. I guess I just kind of tell her what's going on. Like it seems the danger has passed, but we were hoping that you wouldn't mind bringing us to a city over. - Do me a favor, World Diplomacy. - Diplomacy. 'Cause yeah, we did kind of tell her she was gonna fight a dragon, so 12. - Well, it wasn't like she was excited to fight the dragon. Like she's done that before.
It didn't go great for her. She's, okay, so she's nested in this hedge maze. Now normally when you leave the backyard, it's all hedge maze. It's all you can see. You can't really see over the hedge maze. It's this huge thing. Amara's flattened it down considerably. Like she's taken up a large portion of it and has pretty much ruined it. It no longer exists as a hedge maze. It's just kind of a hedge wall for the most part that she's sticking over. - That's adorable. That's the cutest. Can someone draw that? Can someone just draw Amara like, as a little puppy in a hedge maze.
Like it's the cutest thing, anyway. Like Clifford the big fucking red dog is just in her backyard. - So she'll get the message, but with a 12 it comes off maybe a little blunt. Maybe your Draconic is not as fluent as you thought it was. So she's gonna twist around in position, but it's more like fine. It's kind of more that. Everyone do me a favor, roll an athletics check to see how well you get up on to Amara. - Can I teleport again? - You sure can. - Thank you, right? - Ten. - Wow. - Oh my God. - Can I assist the two that are not doing so well? - Yeah, so three.
- Oh, fair enough. Like a five was still better than a one and a two. - Can I, yeah, I was gonna say help me out cause I crit missed. - Yeah. Okay, so I'm imagining Jatia would help Una to get up onto this dragon a bit. And Una is slipping and she can't quite find a grip. And it's, to be honest, it's embarrassing. - Last time I was on a fucking dragon. - You surfed on its face and smashed it in the eye. And this one it's like, oh my. - Actually maybe I'm a little traumatized. - Yeah, okay, maybe, yeah. So it's a little C3PO. It's a little, and Valis is gonna be right behind with even worse.
- Maybe we should go up one at a time from now on. - Cause when we all roll and like three of them are bad, it's like, well, who do I pick to help? Whereas if we rolled one at a time. - Well, I would imagine it's all kind of struggling up the side. This isn't even a roll to see if you fall off or you just say, this is more just how long does it take you? Just to give someone a vision of like mind's eye, like how long did it take you to scale the side of this dragon? It's not pretty. Like an 18 is Jatia pretty deftly climbs up and it's boom, boom, boom, and she's on the back of it.
- Fuck yeah, I got this dragon. - Yeah, everyone else is like, (grunts) like they're just scaling it like a mountain and it's doing very poorly. - Kaluna is not used to the girthy dagger, you know? (laughs) - God, girth fire. - This dragon is so girthy. (laughs) - Jesus fuck. - I said, I promised I wouldn't say it anymore. I didn't say it. - Girth, girth, girth, girth, girth. (laughs) - Okay, so do I roll a flat D20 to help Una up or? - Let's just say that you did it. Let's just say that you did it and it was very much she needed the help. - Let's not turn this into a three stooges thing where I get to quit one and I fall off the dragon trying to help her.
- Yeah, this is very much like you did it and it just looked ugly. So Una's up there, Kaluna's up there, everyone's up there. It just looked hideous. So Amara is going to, this is a bit of a different takeoff in that in Brightport, she kind of has a running start. This is more just vertical takeoff. She's going to leap up into the air, catch herself. - Oh, Thales and I are tied on again. - Yes. Everyone do me a favor, roll an endurance check. Add a plus two to yours, Jensen. - I got 21. - 22. - 19. - Of my things, endurance is actually really high. So that works out.
- 23. - Okay. 21, I added the two already. - Oh, okay. - 'Cause his endurance isn't as high as Jatsy's. Though to be fair, Jatsy has endured a lot, so. Okay, everyone's fine. You'd have to really shit the bed too. Although, Una came close, I'll be honest. - Who's that Brie and Thales? - Fuck, I forgot to roll for Brie, shit. Her endurance is not quite as high. - So when you said Una was close. - Yep. - At 15, that 10 isn't gonna. - No, it's not, it's not gonna do it at all. - It's gonna assist, someone assist. Don't let her fall off the dragon. - Poluna will, I mean it's.
- One second. - This is how she dies, guys. - Wouldn't that, so she lands on her neck or something. It's gonna suck. - And it's fucking done, like bam. No story. - Mar's gonna take off and again, this is an abrupt takeoff because there's no running start, there's no gradual, she's going to sort of leap and then catch herself with her wings and just start to take off. And the violent jerk is gonna be enough to jostle Brie out of her seat in between these spines you guys have wedged yourselves into. And she is going to get ready and start to tumble off the back of this dragon.
She is going to try to, roll an athletics check here, oh man. To see if she can grab a hold. All right, so 22. This would, okay, so she is gonna come sailing, let's say she's wedged somewhere in the middle here. So she's gonna start to tumble backwards and she's going to fall past Jadzia and Valis. Now 22 is gonna be enough for her to be able to grab on if Jadzia and Valis want to assist to help her kind of sit the hell back down. Up to you. - Hi, I went to unmute and I left. What are we doing? - Nothing, you're just sitting on dragon, it's fine. - Okay, cool.
So I should help Brie like to grab her, right? I'm helping her sit down. - Totally up to you. Are you trained in athletics? Probably not, right? - No. - Okay, okay. Well Valis is, so he's okay. Flat D20 plus two. So that's a 10. Okay, Valis is gonna assist her and sort of pull her back to just sort of pull her back to her seat. Just kind of fighting against the rushing wind of it and manage to help her sit back down. This flight isn't gonna be too terribly long. Flying from Esther Holt to the Overwatch, it's probably gonna be around an hour-ish, little over an hour.
- And you're not struck to see who throws up. I have sky sickness, I didn't know. - You have sky sickness? I think there's a better way of. - Motion sickness. - That's the one. Notice how I picked endurance too. - I have sky sickness everyone. - Well, I mean the altitude plus the motion, that would be sky sickness I think. - Exactly, that's what I meant, Mac. That gets me. - How would you guys like to approach the city? Are you looking into a flyover? Okay. - With two giant middle fingers and a dragon. Okay, so the dragon, can we like do a perimeter check just like we did with Esther Holt?
We haven't seen the city in a while, so we don't know the kind of damage the dragon did. - Right, so you're looking to do a flyover. - Yeah. - Okay, yeah, okay. So go ahead and communicate that to Amara. - Hey Amara, the thing I said. - And diplomacy. - Well, wow. - Okay. - I'm consistent. - Yes you are. - I see, Jodzia forgot the word for city, which is really impeding on. - The thing. - Go around the thing. We're going to a thing to do the stuff. - Amara's going to dip out of the sky and start to rocket towards the Overwatch. - That's like the opposite of what I said.
- It's not. So when you said circle around, it more came off as like, let's just strafe them. Let's just see what's, that's how she's taking it. That's what a 12 gets you. So she is going to rocket towards the city and everyone do me a favor, roll perception, 'cause you're going to get a very clear, a very quick and clear look at what's going on. - 24. - Okay. - 22. - 20. - Yeah, I got rock. - That's you still trying to read. (laughing) - Alice got an eight. Brie got an 18. Okay, let's see here. Kaluna, Una, Fi and Brie. Traveling over the city, you're going to see that this place has been the site of a major battle recently.
The gates appear to have been blown clean off their hinges. There is a sizable hole near the front gate where Wall used to be. It's completely blown out. There's rubble and debris, pretty much scattered everywhere at the front of the city. It looks like there have been several fires set within the city. Several buildings have burned down. And Kaluna, let me see, actually Kaluna and Una are going to see that scattered in the city, 'cause you're really close, you have pretty much dive bombed, is races other than human are scattered. It's rare, you'll see maybe one out of every 50 humans, you'll see an elf, or very, very rarely you'll see a dragonborn or something like that, but they're in the city, you can see them.
And it doesn't appear like they're fighting anybody, it appears like they're just walking around. You're also going to see that the city has begun to prep their ballistas, and they are going to start to fire on Amara after, so the first wave wouldn't even be ready for her, that they would kind of see her coming out of the sky, and by the time she's coming in so fast that the first wave wouldn't have time to hit her, but by the time Amara reaches the opposite end of the city, the second wave of ballistas is going to fire on her. So let's-- - Oh no, baby, no!
- Can I warn her so she gets a plus? 'Cause, well, I can't, can someone warn her? 'Cause I didn't see shit. - Well, that's the problem, you're the only one to speak to the dragon, and-- - They can make noises that she might understand. (laughing) - Such as, "Ah!" - Yeah. Or screaming, "Ballistas!" - Fuck, they're attacking us. - You think she would pick up some words, like big fucking arrows? - Can I ask Jadzia how to say the thing and then yell it? - Okay, here's how we're gonna do this. So right now, picture, okay, so this city is immense. So picture Amara as being halfway.
So you'll have a precious few seconds to communicate this back and forth between each other. So here's what we're gonna do. - Actually, on second thought, if Una says to me, ballistas, can I just like grab the reins and make her turn? 'Cause then there'll be less to hit, like, you know, like-- - Sure. - Flat, and then she like turns sideways, and we can all just hold on really, really tight. - Okay. - Wait, is that worse? - Okay, here's the thing. Here's the thing. - That might be worse. - If you do that, that's gonna be an athletics check. Depending on how smoothly you do it, she'll, if you fail that badly, she might jerk suddenly, and everyone's gonna have to try not to tumble out of the sky.
Now, the opposite, the other end of that is if you do nothing, she's probably gonna take ballistifier. The good news is Ammar has an AC of over 30. - Okay. I was just remembering Strahd was like picking that shit out like he had been stabbed with little toothpicks, so. - Right, oh, it hurt him. - Guys, what should we do? - Should the land hands work on dragons? - Yeah, there's a precedent set, yeah, it heals dragons. - So we can always patch her up a little bit. - Okay, yeah, we should probably not fall off a dragon. We've had enough of that. - But yeah, definitely warn her about the ballistas.
- Okay, I'll warn her. - Okay, I will tell Jadzia, like, they're shooting ballistas. - And I'll be like, hey, they're shooting ballistas, but in Draconic. Or actually, can I just yell fuck? 'Cause I'm pretty sure I know that word, so I should get a plus. 'Cause whenever you learn a new language, like the first thing you learn. - You learn their version of fuck. Okay, do me a favor. You're just gonna shout fuck? - Don't say the ballistas. - Fuck ballistas. Fuck ballistas, okay. - But don't sound painful. Diplomacy? - Yes, diplomacy, plus two. - 15, 16, 17, and because Una's next to me, doesn't that technically make it 18?
- You do get a buff to your diplomacy checks, I believe, when Una's next to you. - Yeah, we haven't been using that. We could have avoided all of this. - Okay, Amara is going to start to pull up as soon as you say that. About halfway through the city, so only one or two of these ballistas are gonna be within range. So that's the good news. So let's, okay, they're gonna start to fire. These two ballistas are gonna start to fire. So one, 33 is gonna hit her AC, and 23 is gonna miss. So 33 is gonna hit her AC. 46 damage. - Shit. - So this one's gonna catch her right in the side, right on the belly portion.
So this kind of hit a really sensitive area. As a result, she is going to start to pitch to the right and then swoop down. Now she is leaving the city boundaries and she is flying out towards White Wolf Valley. Now where are you trying to sit down? - Advice, guys, where are we trying to sit down at White Wolf Valley? - Somewhere like maybe like behind a grove tree, somewhere where she can kind of like hide. - Would have been better if she had started flying towards the mountains. - Well, she wasn't exactly, like, this is like, fuck. - Amara, get better at strategizing with a giant fucking arrow in your chest.
- She can always land somewhere and then we can heal her and she can go fuck off somewhere else. - Well, okay. - Yeah, that's true. - Overwatch is on the side of cliffs, isn't it? - Yes. - Could she land at the bottom of the cliffs so that we could make sure she's all right? - Then they just be able to hit her easier. - Well, no, no, no, 'cause-- - She's like, I'm coming at us from above. - Yes, but if we are directly at the bottom, then there won't be enough of an angle. Especially with ballistas, which would be, obviously, trying to get something in the sky.
- Yeah. - Yeah, the ballistas would not be-- - Can they drop shit on her, like pieces of their destroyed city? - Oh, God, yeah. - We don't have to be like right underneath Overwatch. - Yeah, the only thing that the things could be dropped if you're close enough. The only other thing you gotta worry about is arrow fire. - I think we should take her as far away from there as possible. - Yeah, let's just get out of range. They can't run faster than the dragon can fly. - No. - As much as 46 damage is to us, that still wouldn't like bloody Una, and she's a fucking dragon, so I think she can stick it out for a while.
- Yeah, no, that was more like fuck, like that's more someone coming up and punching you. It's not gonna take you out of commission, it's more, you know, but it hurts. - Right. So let's just get out of the way and land in the nearest safe looking area. Even if it's big and empty, as long as they can't reach us, we'll be fine. - Yeah, it's really good that you avoided the other ballistas, though. That was a good thing, 'cause that could have done a lot of damage really quickly. - I noticed that really fast. 5d12. - Yeah, yeah. - That's a lot. - It's a big city, and I mean, Carter was a paranoid guy, and you could say what you want about him, but he was ready for pretty much anything.
- Fair enough. So Amara's going to fly out towards White Wolf Valley, and once you're out of range of the Overwatch, she is pretty close to the ground. She is going to hit the ground running and start to slow down. Pretty smooth landing from, what just happened, that's a pretty smooth landing to go through. It could have been a lot worse. And she's gonna kneel down for everyone to get off, 'cause she's going to start to try and get this ballista out of her gut. - Get the fuck off me. - Pretty much, yeah. But in a very, it's like, okay, get out, go, come on out.
- Okay. - Can I help her out by popping her lay on hands? - Yeah, I'd get the ballista out before that. - Yeah, well, obviously. - Is there any way that we can help get the ballista out, or is it too big for us to help? - It would take all of you tugging and pulling at it, but yeah. - I'll help, but I'm sure she could probably just get it herself. - Yeah, she could reach her neck around and just kind of tear it out. - Yeah, it's the same thing that Strah did. So once everyone's off of her, she is going to rear up and swing her neck around and start to bite at this ballista.
And it's almost out of reach where she'd have to really bend and stretch, but she's gonna jerk this thing out in one clean motion, and she is going to start to bleed pretty profusely. - Okay, I'll run over there and pop my hands on either side of the wound and use lay on hands. - At first, she's gonna jerk, because you're putting your fucking hands on an open wound and she doesn't understand why you're doing that. And then after a moment, the pain's gonna subside and she is going to spin around and sort of nuzzle at Una a bit. - I don't want to be in a friend.
- Una will kind of uncomfortably stroke her nose, just like, yep. - Okay, even with a dragon you can't handle? - Well, I mean the last dragon, you know. - Okay, fair enough. - I thought it was still the, ew, people touching me, and I'm like, deal with it. - No, it's more of a, the last one of you killed me. - Right. - I just killed one of your brethren. - I'm wearing one. You don't seem to mind though, so. - Well, she hasn't, see, okay, that's the thing. She isn't a dragon that's actually grown up around other dragons and in the world. She doesn't have the knowledge of someone, like she would have to be well over a thousand years old to get that big.
And she's not at all. Like she's very much a child in a lot of respects. She doesn't have the wisdom of something that's been on the planet for centuries. - It's just a baby and you stabbed her. Why, Jason, why? - Poor communication, let's blame it on poor communication. - Fair enough. Need to brush my comic. - Maybe let's start working towards the city? - Yep, I would say that's a pretty good idea. - Fair enough. - Let's not tell Amara what's going on or anything, just, just, just. - Just fuck off dragon. We just let you get stabbed in the chest, now stay. Hey Una, do you still have that horn?
- Yes. - Well, that makes this a lot easier. Amara, fuck off, like you can go anywhere, we'll find you. - Do you wanna explain? Maybe like we'll blow that horn. - Yeah, I was gonna, that was a joke. So, Jodzia's gonna ask if you have the horn still, 'cause you know, you did die, you could have lost something. And then when she knows that you do, then she'll turn to Amara and be like, if you'd like, you can, I'm sorry that that happened, first of all. If you'd like, you can go hide in the mountains and we have a horn that we can call you with. Una, would you like to blow on the horn so that she knows what it sounds like?
- I hope to God there's no fucking dragons in this proximity. - I think we'd know. - Yeah, probably. - Wouldn't we know? We live there. - Just drakes come pouring out of the fucking forest. - Okay, fuck off. - Give it a little like, boop. - Yeah, Una will blow on it pretty gently. - Okay. - So be like that sound. - So just kind of a low, it's kind of sad when you don't blow into it at its full capacity. It's just womp womp, that kind of. So Amara, Amara's gonna nod her head, yeah, okay, gotcha. And then she's gonna get ready and run and take off and make her way towards the mountains near the Evergreen.
- Have fun, sweetie. Love you, come back before the lights go out. - Now, as far as you guys are concerned, you have no clue what's going on in the Overwatch other than what you saw. So what would your character's thoughts be? I mean, first of all, do you wanna communicate to each other what you saw? Do you wanna, like, how do you wanna handle this? - So I was busy trying to get the dragon to stop so I didn't see anything. - Una will tell her what she saw. Like, the gates have been blown off. There are humans and other races walking around together. I am assuming victory was achieved.
- Jensa is just gonna kinda like nod and be like, okay, they did it. But she's not really too invested. Like, the only person she really cared about in Overwatch is kinda gone, so. - Where are we trying to go? What are we trying to look for here? Um, Liara, I believe, was the first thing. - Um, Breeze is gonna speak up. - Priority. - If they actually blew the gates off, then they had to have made it into the city. I have to imagine they actually did it. They actually got to Carter's. So we find out who's in charge and we talk to them. - Sounds like a plan. Did anyone else, like, before we go in there, is there anything else people would like to do?
- Fee, would you like to visit your home? - I think that is something that I should do. - I would like to go see my father's office. Luna, is there anyone you'd like to see? - There's no one left alive in Overwatch that I give half a shit about. I'll go with you if you want. - Cheery, okay. Breeze looking for Liara. Felis doesn't really know anyone. Kuna doesn't really know anyone, so. Game plan, we got it, let's go. (laughing) - Just wanted to clarify so we didn't leave anyone in the dust. - On foot, you guys are about 30 minutes away. So getting towards the gates, do me a favor, roll a perception check.
- 28. - Shit, it's 18. 18, yeah, da da da da da. It's exciting for me. - We're proud of you. - Yay. It's like a little kid helping me shake and bake. I'm like, I looked too. There's 34s and like 28s, and I'm like, I got 18, yeah. - No guys, you don't understand. Everyone but Bree is going to notice the plentiful bounty of archers that are positioned on these walls. Now these walls look awful. There's a lot of scorch marks. It looks like a lot of the wall has been just set ablaze on fire at one point. Now the entire area around the gates has been crumbled. Crumbled, it's gone, it's just a mess.
So the archers are on either side of these gates up on the walls, and they have their bows drawn, and they are zeroing in on you. But they haven't fired yet. And from the gates, you're gonna hear a voice call out to them, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. And they're gonna start to train their arrows off of you. And just put their bows down. And you're gonna see Po start to march out from the hole where the gate should be. And he's gonna start to approach the party here. He's gonna hold his hand out to Una. - Yeah, Una will shake his hand for sure.
- Was the dragon you guys? - Yeah, that's us. Don't fucking shoot it. I realize maybe you've had some problems with dragons in the past, but in case you couldn't tell, they're different colors. - Oh, I'm sorry, you kind of showed up unannounced. We've been through some stuff here in the last week. - Yeah, it's classy. - By the way, (laughing) do you always have to show me up? - Yeah, yes, the answer to that is yes, yes I do, yes. - Po's gonna kind of take a step back and survey the party. And he's gonna see Bree and he's gonna run over to her and give her this big hug, kind of scoop her up off her feet.
So Bree doesn't get to, she didn't get to raise her hands to hug back, she's just kind of got her hands kind of bunched down as he scoops her up. And then after a second, he kind of puts her down, he's like, sorry about that. Just, so we got some catching up to do. Do you guys wanna come in? - No, I think we'll just chill out here. - Okay, and he's gonna, (laughing) these two are cunts to each other. I'm just realizing that for the first time. - So much sass everywhere. So we're going inside. - Yeah, we'll follow. - I can't, yeah. - We're gonna play along and we're just gonna stay out here 'cause they're both so fucking sassy.
- He would have just walked away. They're kind of assholes to each other. I'm just realizing that for the first time. - And I wonder if that could, you know, mirror some real life relationship that might be happening. - Nah. - Jesse's not an asshole to me. - Rarely. - Sassy as fuck. - Sassy, not an asshole, yeah. - It's a pitiful attempt at sass, sure. - If this had exactly happened, like if you had gone to visit Jason's house and he was like, do you wanna come in? And you said, no, he would have walked inside and closed the door. I know it. I just want my heart to be true.
- So while you're walking, Po's gonna start to catch you up on some of the things that have happened recently. - So as you can see, we've taken the city. That was a fun day. Do you remember the group you were working with in Winterhaven? Working with is kind of strong. The group you met in Winterhaven. - Yeah. - Yeah. So they actually came through. They were quite a huge help. Actually, they ended up killing Carter, if you could believe it. - The pussy human? - Wait, the ranger? - There's no way. There's no way. He would not have survived that battle. You're shitting me.
- Yeah, you weren't there for that. Okay. From what I understand, the war forge that went with you, you guys did something with him. He came back and stabbed that guy in the chest. Well, in the back through the chest. - When he's gonna look over at Jadzia and be like, that almost makes it worth it. - Jadzia's just gonna like shrug. Death everywhere. I don't give a fuck anymore. Another body. She is gonna ask out of curiosity, where is Ironhide? 'Cause she kind of, she doesn't know what she'd do if she saw him. She's like, he did kind of fuck me over, but I don't really care, but I should be.
It's like one of those things where she's like, I should be mad. - The second you ask, where is Ironhide? Malice is pretty much gonna chime in. Yeah, where is Ironhide? He's very, where is it, fucker? That is a definite sore spot with him. If Jadzia isn't upset, Vala sure the fuck is. - He was the one stabbed with all the fucking, - Well, yeah. - I'm sorry. - That's why, 'cause that could have been you and there wasn't even a thank you, not even a note, not even like a courtesy card. - He left the body, the ugly metal body, just like right in the middle of the fucking living room.
Didn't even pick up after himself. - All pizza boxes strewn over, it was terrible. - I was gonna say, he's dead. Do you remember? And he's gonna give it a moment's pulse. The Minotaur, Yennard, and he's gonna give a glance over to Bree. - Jadzia is also going to immediately look over at Bree. - I think everyone's just gonna like this. - Yeah. - Do you, do you remember, honey? - You should remember. He kind of gored him and threw him out a window. Bree's gonna ask why. A combination of him stabbing the ranger and some other stuff he did in the party before I met him.
But yeah, my understanding was that was a long time coming. That's just what I'm picking up though. I wasn't really, wasn't really there for it. - It got off easy when it comes to this party. 'Cause apparently they just like murder and kill everything. - They just murder their own on a whim. - Po's gonna speak up. Oh, you haven't heard the best part. One of them killed their own dad. - What? - Same day. Same day, yeah. - Who did they kill? - Well, you remember Rod Swell. - Oh shit. Jadzia's gonna smile just like a little bit 'cause she never really liked him that much.
She's gonna get to being a traitor. - Yep. - We're also traitors. (laughing) - Fuck traitors. I mean, not us. I mean, ballast camp. - Fuck all those other guys. - Yeah. - Fuck all those other traitors that aren't us. Yeah, that was pretty tough. Liara took that one hard. She wanted to be the one to kill him, but you can't really tell the guy he can't kill his own father. It was a mess. - Oh, I've been told you the best, best part. So you and the ranger fought outside of Winterhaven, right? - Yep, I guess you won. - Some sort of beef? - Yeah, yeah, let's, yeah, sure, some sort of beef.
- He summoned Strahd, kind of. Well, okay, my understanding of it, and again, I'm catching this all third hand really. Keric, who was leading the Dragonborn at the time, was losing, didn't take it too well, wanted to call in Strahd, and that guy gave him the nod. - Oh, let's just tell you this right now. Don't get too excited, but yeah, Strahd's dead. - Wait, what? - Strahd is dead. - Right now, dead, just dead, dead. - Yes, he's dead, dead, from what we can tell. I mean, I was dead at the time, but apparently there was a corpse. Myself, Craig, and some other Paladins went to fight him.
We all died, and Bree finished him off. - Uh, Poe's gonna stop dead. Like, just stop, just, okay, wait. Again, this constant need to top me is getting old, Una. Okay, I just told you we took the city. It's, the city's ours. - You're telling me you fought Strahd with a handful of Paladins, and Bree, and he points over to Bree, and you died, and since you're not dead anymore, I'm guessing there's a story there too. - Oh yes. - And you finished Strahd off, he's dead. Legendary Strahd, dead. - That was all Bree. I mean, I knocked out one of his eyes, sure, but Bree did a lot of the killing.
- Bree's looking down, like very much not wanting credit for this, and Poe's gonna kind of lean in just a little bit, like, really? And she's gonna look up just for a second. He tried to eat me, I sort of punched through his head. And there's gonna be this kind of stunned shock come over his face, 'cause for a second he's thinking, you're fucking with him, just a bit. Like, oh yeah, don't worry, we took care of that. That's a pretty monumental task. It's like, yeah, I punched God out at a bar one night. And he's gonna take his hand and just kind of like slam it on Bree's shoulder, like, oh, fucking A, awesome.
But not really hard, just more like, wow, okay, that is great. And after a second of this, he's gonna look back to the party. Okay, any more big surprises you wanna get out? - Do we have anything else? Oh, I've renounced Kord. - God damn it. - It's only a small thing, but I've renounced the God we've both followed for all of our lives. - I don't wanna trouble you with it, but. Almost forgot. - It's like saying I'm not eating beets anymore. You know, it's no big deal. It's like, I just don't wanna eat beets. - Makes my pee a funny color. Kord makes my pee smell funny.
- Po's gonna look at Una. Yeah, okay, right. And he's gonna start to walk again. He's gonna start to walk towards the city. That is such an absurd thought to him. It's like, yeah, no, sure you did, champ. He thinks you're fucking with him. He's not gonna take it seriously. - Una will slap one of her hands on his shoulder and like kind of grab down a little bit the hands that are completely burnt and black now. And just kind of hope he notices that. - Let me ask you a question. Did Una get into her armor before she left or is it just the dress still? - Oh yeah, she has her armor, but she never has gloves on her armor.
- Okay, right, I'm just making sure. Like I didn't know if it was, yeah. Let's see if Po notices. - Like Crit misses perception. He's like, oh, that hurts. It's stuck to my shoulder. - Oh no, he notices. - So I imagine there's a face that kind of accompanies that. That's like, no, seriously though. Po's gonna, like very much he was playing it off. Like, yeah, no, no, sure. And then after you grab him up, turns around, he sees her hands and he's gonna look at Una's face. Well, you're serious. - I'm dead serious. Get it? 'Cause I died. (laughing) - She's gonna whisper that too.
And kinda grin, like a tiny little bit. - Why? - Like I said, I died. I remember being dead and there was nothing. I died fighting a legendary dragon whose eye I had just smashed into oblivion. And apparently that wasn't brave enough to get me into heaven. And since I'm not buying that fucking excuse, I'm assuming rightly that there's fucking nothing. - Sorry, that's a lot to process. Just, well, okay, can we talk about this later? 'Cause I wanna talk about it, but I got one more surprise for you guys. - And it will nod like, yeah, sure. - Okay. Before we march inside here, you mentioned Craig.
What happened to Craig? - The last I saw, he was smashed off the cliff. I'm assuming he's dead. - You can see that bothers Pella a lot. Shit. - Julie is in charge of the temple now and she is not too happy with me. - We'll talk about it later. - All right, yeah. How about you guys take a walk with me? We're going to Castle Overwatch. - I still called Overwatch. - Yeah, it's still called Overwatch right now. Do you mention that to him or is it? - Sure, I'll be like, so you haven't changed the name? - It's not really up to me. And we're kind of trying to make this as peaceful a transition as possible.
We figure walking in, changing the name, taking down all the flags, we're trying to do this one step at a time. You might not know this, people here hate us for the most part. Did you know that? - You know, I'm not surprised. - After he says that conjunce, do like a really quick look around and be like, do they hate us? - Yeah, if you guys wanna roll a streetwise check, kind of get the vibe coming in off the street. - 20. - 21. - 14. - Oh, I'm sorry. - Oh God, what's Valis' streetwise? Oh, actually that's not too bad. - Damn, Chris. - Wow, Kalina knows what's up on the streets, guys.
- For a tree, it's pretty fucking good. - Yeah. - Valis got a 19, Bree is not too street savvy. - What is the definition of us that he is? Is like the white ravens or? - Anybody who charged through the gates and took the city, he's more, it's us is a lot of things. Us refers to other races, us refers to what would be viewed as oppressors, people, you know, an attacking army that is occupying the city. Now us is a lot of things. - Anyone who wasn't Overwatch, kind of. - Pretty much, yeah. Anyone who wasn't living in the city. And even though you guys were kind of the picture of the Overwatch for a very short time, you guys would be, you guys would kind of be lumped in.
You know, you're traitors and yeah, so yeah. And again, that's not everyone. You know, of the thousands of people who live in the city, there's a lot of them who are just like, okay, this is how it is. They could have killed all of us, they didn't. So maybe they mean it when they say they want peace. So that's the best case scenario. People are almost indifferent. The worst are the people who were Carter sympathizers, who hate this and would do almost anything to get you out of the city, put up the gates and wall themselves back up. - Out of curiosity, how long has it been that it's been named Overwatch as opposed to Overdale?
- That has been, geez, that has been-- - 17 and a half years? - No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, that took a while. Because there was a coalition of people who tried to attack the city before as when it was Overdale. And that's pretty much when Carter flipped clean off the deep end and decided that not only were humans not allowed in the city, but they were going to war against everybody outside of the walls as well. So it has been Overwatch formally for about six or seven years now. - Okay. - So walking through the streets here, you're getting a vibe that, let me see, who's getting the vibe?
Valis and obviously, Kaluna. And Una and Jadzia. You're all getting the vibe that you're, you're not exactly welcome. They're not violent, they're not going to, they're not gonna riot, they're not gonna do anything. But it's very much you're getting the vibe that it's like, look at these fucking people. And it's, there's a very tense feeling. There's a very tense feeling in the city. Because like I said, every once in a while, actually walking through the city, you can see them now. There are some dragonborn scattered. You could see drow. And you're seeing more drow than anything, actually.
They're mingling in the crowds. - Oh shit, I forgot. - Yeah. That is not going away. Yeah, that's, of the races that you're seeing, you'll see a few scattered elves, but it's a lot of drow. Like in the concentration of people who aren't human, it's four to one. - Hey, so what's our beef with the drow again, right? - Children. - We killed their children. We blamed it on Marcus. - Well, they don't have a beef with us, but we are the ones who said that it was Marcus. And then we have, not that they know this, but we have killed Marcus. - So let's just keep going with that lie and then tell them that we killed Marcus.
I mean, I'm sure they wanted to kill him too. - We had a confrontation with Marcus and it resulted in his death. - Yeah, there we go. We can diplomasize this. We got good diplomacy. Not that I've said that we're gonna fucking fail, but. (laughing) - Well, we'll see. So walking through the city, you're gonna see that there's some rubble. There's some burnt buildings, particularly towards the front gates. The further back you get, it gets a little better, but a lot of the houses towards the front gates have been burned down. Walking deeper in, it's almost fairly peaceful.
Towards the back of the city, there are merchants selling things. There are people, they're coexisting. Again, it's slightly tense, but there's no screaming. There's no rioting. There's no fighting. You'll even see the rare instance of an elf buying a piece of fruit from a vendor or something. You'll see them. They're in the city. That's fucking bizarre in Overwatch. That is weird. Getting to the castle, there are actually a few elves standing guard and some white ravens. And Poe's gonna give them a wave and they're gonna open the doors and let you in. And Poe's gonna motion for everyone to walk inside.
- Okay, let's walk inside. - Okay, I'm just making sure that people's like, "Nope, fuck that." - It's like the Sims where you can't just walk towards a building. You have to have an action for opening the door and going inside. - As you start to ascend, so you're gonna start to climb towards the throne room of this place. Poe's gonna start to tell you, so after the city fell, boy, there's so much to catch you up on. So after the city fell, some of the leaders of the different races and armies couldn't make it to the vote, but we did have a vote to see who'd be running things.
And he's gonna look back to the party and smile. You're about to meet the queen of the Overwatch. - Oh yeah? So still ascending. After a while you get to the outside of the throne room. Now, normally there is a set of big double doors that would section this place off. It appears as though those doors have been smashed clean off their hinges and that's just shattered, gone. So you can see clean into the room. There's nothing standing there. In the room there is this big table, this long table with all kinds of maps and parchment sort of spread out. And Liara is standing in the center of the room going over some things.
- Is Liara the queen of the Overwatch? - That is a decent guess. You can talk to her and see. - Una will go, "Holy shit!" - That'd be really embarrassing if she's not. (laughing) Holy shit, you're the queen! No, I'm the secretary, thanks though. Now I feel really bad about myself inside. - I was feeling really good. - Do you see a crown? Yeah, there's no crown. You were seeing a distinct lack of crown actually. - Is her eye patch now bedazzled? 'Cause if I were a queen with an eye patch. - Do me a favor, roll perception. - That means it is bedazzled, guys. One of us just has to notice. 10.
- 31. - God, Colunna's got that. - 21. - 22. - You gotta have good perception when you're surrounded by werewolves, guys. So, let's see. Colunna, Una, Fi, they are all going to, and Valis. You're all gonna notice first and foremost, the most eye-catching thing about this room is the light streaming in from the big smashed window in the back. You can tell that there used to be a stained glass window. It's actually pretty iconic. You would know that it was a stained glass window of Carter standing over the city, kind of watching over his flock, that type of thing.
And it has now been smashed. The only thing remaining of it are the bits of stained glass window around the edge, these jagged bits. Liara is wearing some much nicer clothes than she's used to sporting. As a matter of fact, her clothes were fairly tattered. In the last month, she had been in several scuffles where she had been sliced open, she had been pounded and beaten, and she just never really had time to get a new set of clothes. The best she could do is kind of wash them and put them right back on. These are actually a bit nicer. Instead of the usual black, she's sort of wearing this red and gold trimmed outfit.
It doesn't exactly look like her. This doesn't look like something she'd go pick out based on what you know of her. But yeah, she's sort of standing in the middle of this room and she appears to be alone. So it would make complete sense to you that when Poe's talking about the Queen of the Overwatch that he's talking about Liara. Poe's actually gonna stop at the entrance of, he's actually going to stop at the entrance of this throne room and sort of call out to Liara, "My queen!" And partway through the sentence, she's gonna shut the fuck up. That is her response to him.
And she's gonna spin around and see that it's you guys, and specifically Brie, and she is going to run over and scoop up Brie and hug her. That is the second time Brie has been scooped up off her feet and she fucking hates that. But since it's Poe and Liara, and this time Brie manages to kind of get her arms up and she's squeezing the shit out of Liara. And after a couple of seconds of that, she's gonna let her go and she's gonna reach out and start to kind of, it's part handshake, part hug. She's gonna start to handshake and then just bring each one of you in really closely.
- Like gangster style? - Kind of, just kind of more like, we've been through some shit, that kind of thing. - Does she pat me on the back twice so I know it's not gay? - No homo man. - She does say no homo. - Okay, as long as she whispers in my ear, her tongue tickling my ear lobe. Really close so I can feel the girth of it. (all laughing) - You're gonna leave this in your position. (all laughing) - Liara's gonna say, I am glad to see you guys. You have no idea. - You are queen? - Technically, yeah. Please don't call me queen. - Your majesty? - I swear I'll hit you.
- Reverend? (all laughing) - Yeah, seriously, please don't call me queen. Liara's fine. But yeah, a vote was held and it was decided because I'm human that it would probably be easiest for people to accept. - Ah, yes, racism. The deciding factor in everything in this universe. - Does Jetsu say that? - You know, sure, why not? I very rarely say yes in this circumstance. - Well, it isn't just that. I've worked with the elves for a long time. I used to live in the city. I have a pretty good idea of what people are like. They're not all bad. It's just. - I know, honey, I wasn't trying to be mean.
- Just put on the defenses immediately. - I'm sorry. - Do you think you're fucking qualified, honestly? - Yeah. - No, every queen I've ever seen had two eyes. - Aww. - Do you think they're gonna trust someone who deserted their city once before, really? No, no, Jansia. Una's sassy, but she's not that sassy. - Okay, so now we know she's queen. We know she's alive, which was the main point of coming here. Jansia is going to after she's like, "Oh, I was just kidding." Kind of, that's kind of how she plays off is, "No, no, I was just kidding, but kind of not really, 'cause everything is about racism in this fucking universe." - Yeah, Valis would kind of give a glance like, "Really, you're kidding? 'Cause, um." - Try making me king, see how that works out.
- Not just that, but it's more like, "Do you remember how we met? 'Cause." - Yeah, sorry about that. I was a little bit racist. - I only thought you were gonna burn my body and pull me into your house and keep me there for six years. Jansia is going to ask Lyara if she can see Patrick's office, if it's still there. - Yeah, that would be Tenbolt's office, actually. - She is going to visibly tense when she hears that. Like in the back of her mind, she knew, but she was like, "That's disgusting," to her. - How about you guys come over here and have a seat?
I think we should catch each other up. Okay, so everyone's taking a seat at this table. - Kaluna would like to sit in the window. - Sure. - On the spiky, on the last shot. - You know, you can like kick them out of the way. - Sure. - Just break shit, sit down. - So just like feet dangling over the side type of thing? - Yep. - Okay, so you're gonna get a lovely view of the city. The parts of it that aren't burnt down look especially nice. Okay, Lyara is going to, Lyara is going to start to fill you in. So after you guys deserted the city, what I'm gathering is that Flo and Patrick were hung, and that had something to do with Tenbolt and Marcus.
I don't know exactly what happened. I'm still going through journals. I'm still going through reports, but closest I can figure is that Marcus worked out some sort of deal to elevate the Crimson Shield with Tenbolt, and in turn, Tenbolt was going to make Marcus a captain. Tenbolt took over for Patrick. Apparently that only lasted a couple of days, maybe, at the most, before Marcus turned on him. And this is coming from the council, by the way. This is just what I'm able to suss out from reports, but it wasn't long after that that Tenbolt was hung. So yeah, we're still sorting things out.
Apparently one of Tenbolt's prime directives was to completely gut Patrick's office and get rid of any of his possessions. I will say that we did manage to save a lot of Patrick's personal effects. In his room, apparently he had something hidden away. A member from the group that you worked with in Winterhaven actually found it and brought it to me. So we figured, Jadzia, you might like to go through that. - Jadzia's going to look very nervous 'cause she doesn't really know what to do in this sort of situation, but then she's going to nod and lower her head and just thank Liara profusely.
So I'm just going to look over at Liara and just say, does Margasana still have quarters here? And if he does, can I be allowed access to them? - Yeah, yeah. A lot of his personal things are still here. He did have an office for however brief a time. You're free to look through it if you like. No one else is allowed in or out. It's the same thing with Patrick's and Tenbolt's office until I figure out exactly what was going on here before we came in and took over. I'm just trying to get a clear picture of what we're dealing with, but yeah, you're absolutely allowed to go through it if you like.
Speaking of Margas, we actually have a problem. You may have noticed a pretty large surge of drow as you were walking through the city. - Yes. - Well, I've been dealing with a near riot on my hands now for a few days, and they want Margas. They were to understand that he's here, he's obviously not, and I don't really know what to tell them about that. They're not taking no for an answer on this one. - Theorra doesn't know that we killed Margas. - Well, it's not that she doesn't know that Margas is dead. It's just that they're not taking no for an answer, and she doesn't know what to tell him beyond, "Well, we don't have him.
"He's not here, he's not alive. "I don't know what to do for you." And they're just, "Well, no, that's bullshit. "He is here because we were told he's here." - They're not listening to her. - Didn't we put his head on a spike or some shit? Didn't we do something weird with him? - We sent his head back to the Overwatch with messages. - Oh, we did, so it should be here. - They may have just fucked off. They may have turned into a machine and fucked that shit. - Ew, I'm not carrying this all the way down there. - Yeah, I'm not carrying this miles back to the city.
Fuck that. - Did you receive any deliveries from Pesterholt? You know, kind of like a head-shaped box? - It's just a head wrapped in Christmas paper. Like it's just tightly wrapped. - To Carter. - It's just written on it like a Sharpie. - You have a heart at the bottom. - From your worst enemy. - Oh, they remembered. - Get Liara in and just say, "I think I can help deal with the Drow. "Where do we find their leader?" - Or is not hard to find. She's right in the center of town. She's been questioning people now for three solid days and they're growing less and less patient.
So it would be great if you could deal with that at some point today, at least. I very much appreciate it. Quick question. You guys wouldn't happen to know anything about trolls, would you? - Jazzy. - How about everyone roll a nature check? - I was gonna say, I can roll a nature check. Cool. Wow, I wish I could have rolled like a history. - Jesus Christ. - Something I'm good at. - Keluna is nature. - Two crits today on skill checks. - I know, actually, I know quite a bit about trolls. Did you know they can rip a man in half? - That's incredible. - That's an ogre.
- Fun fact. Good, at least that's one thing not coming back to haunt us right now. - Ooh, Valus rolled a crit once, nope. Brie rolled an 18. So let's see, Keluna and, okay, Keluna's gonna know everything about trolls. Keluna's gonna know a fair bit. Una and Brie will know a fair bit, actually. Brie's just gonna raise her hand 'cause she's been pretty quiet this entire time. I know they're big. I know that they're pretty hard to beat unless you use fire. Keluna would know that trolls are not only massive, but fairly quick for their size. They have been known to wipe out whole parties of adventures who are unfortunate enough to let their guard down near them.
They also regenerate flesh at an alarming rate unless you use some sort of fire to neutralize that regeneration. They're aggressive and nasty, and they're pretty much wild beast killers. So that would be what Keluna knows. - Do they smell funny? - They smell like troll. So yeah, funny, that would be a good way to... I'm imagining Keluna's gonna relate that to the party. - Oh yeah. - Leor's gonna go bingo, yeah. We're kind of dealing with a situation. You're all familiar with the tournament of champions, right? - No. - Yes. - Yes. - All right. - Well, shortly after you all left the city, they held it and apparently the troll did very well.
Actually killed off an entire party in the last round. And ever since then, it has been taking up residence in the dungeons of the arena. Problem is we want it out of the city, and we don't see a way to do that without killing it. I'd rather not, but at the same time, we're gonna release it into the wild, and it'll just go kill someone else. So the problem is everyone in the city saw what it did to the last party who took it on, and they don't want anything to do with it. Now, look, I know everyone here has been through a really tough month. Believe me, I sympathize.
If you don't wanna deal with it, don't worry about it. We'll figure out a way to get rid of it. But the offer's on the table and I can pay you. I'm in a position where I can definitely pay you. - Okay, so basically what we're saying is, troll in the dungeon! Sorry. That's all I can think for like the last five minutes. Can't you just like set a fire and pull back? That's what I'm hearing anyway. - Just drop fucking like fire down into the hole. - Well, what the fire does, it neutralizes its regeneration. That doesn't kill it. - Yeah, but the fire will kill it.
- Yeah, you kill everything. - Yeah, the fire will just, yeah. They're not trying to burn the city down. They're just trying to-- - Stone dungeon. - It's not all stone. I mean-- - Well, you don't have to light the whole thing on fire, Jason. - Even if you did, you just burned down the Tournament of Champions area, not the entire city. - Well, the arena is kind of a big deal within the city. Again, they're trying not to destroy anything that people's like, "What, you can't do that!" They're trying to-- - Okay, why not just flood it then? - 'Cause then it would regenerate, and it would be like the zombies in "Rubs and Evil." - I get it.
I mean, I don't know, I feel like if it drowned, it stays drowned, regardless of whether or not it regenerates long to-- - Well, it can come back. - Ew. - Gross. - Okay, I got quite a few fire powers. Not like flames of legithos and shit, so. - Liar's gonna say, "Look, I really appreciate it. I'm trying to put out several fires right now, and to be honest, the troll is so far down on the list. What do you want for doing it?" - Immunity from the Drow. (laughing) - We'd like some diplomatic immunity, please. - Diplomatic! - That might be really useful. - Well, you're gonna have to explain to Liar what you did then.
- No, that's gonna, we're taking that to our question. - Okay, okay, okay, couldn't we say, because we were the ones that killed Marcus, you know, we have kind of stolen their kill, so it's like, well, we've stolen their kill, so they may be pissed at us, so we need diplomatic immunity, just in case. - There we go. - Okay, you're gonna pitch that? - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - I also want money. I'm good about the money part of this that we want. - Yeah, money and diplomatic immunity. - And I wanna be a knight. I don't have enough titles yet, I only have like seven.
I want one. - And I want some pretty clothes, and a pony. - Oh, and if you're not gonna wear the crown, I want it. I won't call myself queen, I just wanna wear a crown. - You already have a crown. - On top of my crown. - Crowns for your crown. - One thing that I think would be quite useful would be immunity from the drow. I doubt that they would be very happy that we technically stole their kill. - Okay, I'll tell you what I can do. I can get Aurra up here, and we can all sit down and try and hash this out. How does that sound? - That sounds fine at present, but what happens once we are no longer in the room?
- Well, they seem reasonable enough. If we can come to some sort of agreement, I don't see her violating that. To be honest, if we explain the situation as calmly as possible, there's no vengeance to be had for them, is what I'm hearing. They're gonna be pissed, but at the same time, everyone wanted the same thing. They wanted Marcus dead, it's done. Hopefully we can just move on. I give you my word that they're not gonna do anything to you, at the very least while you're in the city. I'll make sure someone's watching you 24/7, if you think it's gonna be a real problem.
- I think we'll be fine. - All right, so Bree's gonna speak up. If you guys have things to do, I'm gonna stay behind here and talk to Leora a bit. - And talk about your relationship problems? - I don't know, yeah. - I'm just gonna be like, "And Una's gonna leave the room right the fuck now." Yeah, Una will just get up, kind of do a small little bow to Leora and go find Marcus's quarters. - Leora's just gonna glare at Una when she bows. (laughing) - Cool, can Fi stand up? - Pause for a second because he was going to bow and then follow Una down to Marcus's chambers as well.
- Jadzia will stand up and she'll bow her head, but she does that fucking all the time, so it's not really a sarcastic thing. - Yeah, it's not, yeah. - She's constantly bowing her head, 'cause it's stupid. And she's going to, she pauses for a second, 'cause she's not sure if she should go get her father's things or just follow Una, and then she does end up following Una. - All right. - Kaluna will wave as she goes to follow everyone else. - Dang shit. (laughing) - Making your way to Marcus Santa's office. You guys have been, Leora has let everyone know that you guys are allowed to enter this place.
No one else is allowed to. This has been completely sealed off from anyone else. Everyone roll a perception check. Let's see what you see in this office. This is not a huge office, by the way. It's moderately sized. - 25, holy shit, I quit. (laughing) - I really wanted to find something. - Yes. - I found all of his anime porn, and I found his SMM gear. Big black dildo under the pillow. And a paintbrush, which is weird. - Which he'll give to you. - It's gift wrapped and everything. (laughing) - Well Kaluna, Jadzia, and Una. Looking around this room, it has largely been untouched.
It looks like no one has come in here for a while. You would know that the last place Marcus was was in Esterhold, so you're guessing the last person to come into this office was probably Marcus. And that was shortly before his demise. You're going to find several journals that appear to be written by Marcus. You're also going to find 400 gold searching through the drawers of his desk. You're gonna find that. You're also gonna find a sealed letter. - Open that. - All right, this is addressed to Jadzia. So I don't know if you still want to, I don't know if you still want to be the one to open this or you want Jadzia to be the one to open it, but it is definitely, it's strange.
It's written, it looks to be handwritten on the face of it to Jadzia, and it appears to be in Patrick Grace's handwriting. - Huh. - Okay, yeah, we'll hand that to Jadzia and say, take this with a lot of grains of salt. - We did know he's a perjury person. Jadzia will open the letter. First, I will just read it outright and then I will perception check it. - Sure. - 'Cause there's something already, like I read through it already, there's something already very fishy about this letter. Jadzia, I am sending this to you to let you know that everything is going as expected.
Your faked defection to the white ravens has demoralized the rest of the crimson shield, and that would immediately, like I don't even think that requires a perception check because Patrick didn't, that wasn't faked and her father didn't know that that was gonna happen. Jadzia knows that. With this news and their ranks depleted, I should be able to set up, sorry, set up's one word, should set up a tournament of champions to eliminate them. I'm sorry for the loss of Gavin Dearborn. I believe he had the framework to be a great leader, but sacrifices must be made.
I hope you are well in the evergreen. I have been forced to promote Marcus Sonn as the position of field commander. I do not believe this man is up to the task. If I'm right, we will see Marcus crack under the pressure. He's already making bad choices in teammates. I'm not going to contact you again until after the war is over. It's safer that way. Sorry, it must be that way, but we cannot risk being discovered. With love, Patrick Grace. So that's fishy. - So did you read that out loud to everyone? - Yes. - Okay. - Can I insight check that? 'Cause technically this letter is a bluff, right?
- Yeah. - Sweet, my insight's higher. - Your modifier is probably higher than what's required to extract that. - All right, so 16. - Okay, 16 is plenty to figure this out. It would appear as though- - Just so everyone knows at home, we all figured this out. - It would appear as though, so Jadzia, after looking at this for a moment, she's gonna notice that reading the letter to the left of it, every first word going down seems to spell out a message. So you can relay that to the rest of the group if you like. - So Jadzia's gonna visibly look kind of angry at first because this is clearly the letter that had her father killed.
And the code is so fucking obvious that she can't believe anyone fell for it. And she's angry about that because to the left, if you read it straight down, it says, "Jadzia, I faked this to frame the commander. Marcus, I'm sorry." Which kind of sounds like he's apologizing to himself, but I think I know what he was going for there. Like he was signing it, Marcus, and then following it up with, "I'm sorry." Unless he was apologizing to himself because bipolar or something. I'm sorry, Marcus. Shut the fuck up. - Does Jadzia read this, everyone? - She will point to it as she reads it down.
Like she holds it out so everyone could see and she's just gonna read straight down for everyone. And then she is going to crumple the letter in her hand and drop it to the ground. - Oona's gonna like stifle bursting into laughter because she realized this is what killed Jadzia's father. But like at the same time, it's so dumb that it's unbelievable that anyone actually could ever like write this. So she's gonna like stifle laughter and then check herself and realize like, no, this is a fucked up thing. And just like put her hand on Jadzia's shoulder in sympathy.
- He is gonna look at Jadzia and Oona and say, "It looks like he was a backstabbing asshole "from the beginning. "It's a good job that we got away from that." - Jadzia's just gonna nod tersely and like look around the room and she's so angry. Like clearly whoever had been given this letter did not even try to see if it was real or not. Like they looked at the handwriting and they were like, well, that looks good enough for me to kill a man. - Can I look through those journals? Can I like flip through them and see what I can? - Can he look through as well?
- Sure. - Fee is looking for any information that relates to the drow explosion. - Okay, you can go right ahead and roll a perception check, please. Both of you. - 26. - 25. I'm looking for anything that will amuse me. So everything. - Okay, well looking through, you can chart this man's paranoia and it starts briefly after the Crimson Shield was assembled. He's giving assessments of his team. So there'd be little missives. How to fight with Una today, that kind of thing. Yeah, you can chart where the paranoia sets in and that's pretty much just after the Crimson Shield is assembled.
When Una assaults Marcus, you can, like there's a pretty lengthy, there's a pretty lengthy journal entry about how he isn't really sure if he can trust Una. If maybe she's too hot tempered to follow orders and be a part of this group, there is definitely a very long section about Flo. He basically goes on to say he wished he could have done more to save her. He wanted to help her, but couldn't in the moment. But there is nothing in here where he takes credit for her death when he is absolutely to blame. There is a plan and this is him writing more to himself, charting out a plan to eventually become king of the Overwatch.
The plan was to get close enough to Carter for Carter to trust him and then eventually stab him in the back and usurp him and take the throne. Una's gonna burst out laughing reading this. Just like not hysterical laughter, like cackling, unbelievably amused laughter. And she's just gonna like crying, hand the book over to Jadzia. Just like, holy shit, holy shit. - Jadzia is still like very angry. Like you can tell she's just glaring at this fucking letter 'cause she's so mad that that did it. But then when she reads what Una's putting in front of her, she kind of like huffs a little bit.
Like maybe we should have put a crown on his head before we put it in the box. (laughing) That was in character. Is there anything else in the journals? - Those would be the most useful things. He goes on and on and on about himself. Marcus was a pretty narcissistic guy. So everything in the journals relates to him in some way. It's not so much thoughts and opinions about other people in his life. It was more, how can these people help me or how could they hinder me in some way? How can I, how can I? He talks about himself in the third person a lot. He would actually use the term, how can Marcus spin this to his advantage?
That type of thing. So there'd be several situations where he was, he would talk about Gavin and how he could be an excellent leader. And then when he took over as leader, he sort of had aspirations of running the Crimson Shield as a high ranking military figure eventually. And there are definitely, if you were to take this as a whole, Marcus appeared to be a very paranoid individual who thought incredibly highly of himself. - Do we find anything in the journals about the Drow? - Nothing where he takes, nothing where you could show the Drow and say, this guy, this is, you know, nothing like that.
Sorry, you cut out there, what'd you say? - Nothing where you could take that to the Drow and say, here, this is what we're talking about. This, it's more, he will, he covers the incident. You all, you know, loading up into the caverns and then the explosion. And he does mention, he does mention Jadzia. - Okay, let's take those pages out of the journal. What, so that is something that Fee would want to look at. What else would be in that journal? - That is the most recent, some of the most recent entries between the Crimson Shield and your departure, Flo and Patrick's death, and pretty much up until he leaves for Esterhold.
- Okay, Fee is gonna, if he's not holding the book, he's gonna grab it and flick through it to find those things and say, does anybody need anything from this book? - Don't destroy it. I would only take out the pages that are incriminating for us. - If we take out just the pages, there's potential for it to be obvious that there have been pages removed. - All we have to say is that the pages were removed. We don't need to say that we did it. - If there is no book, there is no pages to have been removed from. - I think I'm gonna be with Fee on this because even if they don't blame us for taking the pages, they'll think that someone in Overwatch took the pages.
It'll look suspicious even if it doesn't make us look suspicious, you know what I mean? If we take out just a select number of pages, the draw will get suspicious that it wasn't Marcus, and we're trying to make it, even if they're not suspecting us, they'll suspect someone else in Overwatch, and the riots will probably get worse. - Yeah, I just feel like we shouldn't destroy any evidence, but then again, there's not really any evidence of anything in there that we need. - At that, that the dune said, Fee is just gonna set light to it. - Wait, wait. Oh shit, I mean, I just, the drow don't need to know that we have the journal, you know?
Like, we don't even need to tell them we found one of his journals. We can just be like, we killed him, bro. - Yeah, Fee is not taking any chances on this. - Okay, so Una has, okay, so Una has, Una has pretty much voiced her opinion of the group that she doesn't think it should be burned, and Fee's just gonna burn it up. Just to be clear. - Well, from the point of Una semi-agreen on that, like, the book, the book shouldn't be found by anyone. Fee is just gonna be like, "Okay, yeah, I'm burning it, and just burn it." - Una's gonna look disappointed and just be like, "Be sure to hold onto that." That was, we didn't need to tell him that it was there.
- The risk is, the risk is too high. If it exists, there is potential for it to come back or for someone to find it. I'm not risking that. - Well, it's too late now. Let's poke around and see if we can find anything else. - I really hate to bring this up, but you did just set fire to something indoors, which means spoke and grossness. Should we open windows and shit? 'Cause I just remember Drake Hornet setting fires indoors, and it was a big deal. - Well, okay, wait, he would launch a fireball at something, and then they'd get in a full-blown argument around the blaze.
This was a little different. This was like a small fire. - Have you ever set up to fire to a book indoors? 'Cause I have. It doesn't go well. - No, no, no, I'm not saying that you should. - Is there a fireplace in the room or something? - Yeah, that's right, 'cause it's probably a big problem. - Marcus's office was not... Marcus didn't have a corner office with a window and a nice, he had a much smaller office. No fireplace or anything. This would be, I mean, you could just stomp it out and just use his carpet to smother the, but I mean, yeah. - Okay, well, can I hold it with telekinetic grasp and burn it with sonic spark?
- How long does the grasp last? - It does not say, I don't think. - I would say that's only for a few seconds. It's not gonna be something you can hold it during. - Well, it's an at-will sonic minor action. One object that weighs 20 pounds or less, isn't carried by another creature. You can manipulate the target or move it five squares to a square within range. - Yeah, so this would be a few seconds. - Yeah. - So that's not gonna be long enough to burn an entire book, but I mean, you don't have to be holding it when you light it up, obviously. - Yeah. - So yeah, there'll be some smoke and there'll be some, yeah, obviously something was done in this room.
I mean, it's not too hard to figure out. It's like, oh, someone burned something in this room that's been off limits. I mean, that's not great, but yeah. - Is there anything else in the room that we find? - Not really. That's the stuff that would be of interest to you guys. - How boring. - So Patrick doesn't have an office. So you'd be going to his private quarters, which is on a different floor. So heading to Patrick's private quarters, this is another area that has been sectioned off. There are actually two, there are two elves actually standing guard outside of the room, making sure that no one enters.
Liyar told you that his possessions are right there and no one has touched them after they were found. And they are in a large chest that has been drugged to the center of the room. You can see that there was a closet and there was some sort of secret panel inside the closet. And obviously everything from that has been drugged out. This is a fairly large chest. - I will open the chest. Like she's not even looking at the two guards who are stationed there. Like she just walks straight in, like she fucking owns the place. She kind of does. She owns everything.
Yeah. I just realized that. Like I have way more possessions than the rest of you in general. Like none of them are helpful, but. - I was about to say, wait a second. Jadsey is what, 25? - Yeah, I think so. Let me check. 23, yeah. - 23, she's doing quite well for a 23 year old. She has a fucking mansion and you know, she- - Half a hedge maze. - Damn these kids and their inheritance. Fucking millennial. - Selfie. Okay. - So inside this chest, do me a favor. Do me a favor right now, roll a perception check. Just to see, just to kind of take this in. - I don't even want to say that out loud.
- Okay. It's an eight. - Well, Jadsey is going to see that there are there are some letters and journals and such, but she's not really going to make out anything of interest. There is one letter that is sitting on top of a stack that is tied with twine. That one appears to be slightly newer than the rest of them. - She will open that one up. The letter says, 'cause I know that Patrick knows things. The letter says, dearest Jadsey, if you're reading this, then something has gone horribly wrong and I am most likely no longer with you. I wish I had the time to explain everything to you in person.
Unfortunately, there's simply no time. As I write this, pressure has begun to mount here in the city. I fear that my time is growing short. It has become clear that Captain Tenbolt wants to be rid of me. As of today, you have been labeled an enemy of the city and a traitor. I understand why you felt you had to leave and I want you to know that I'm very proud of you. You've had to overcome a great deal in your short life. When I found you in Esther Holt, you were hurt and frightened. Since then, I've watched you grow and become stronger than I ever thought possible.
In this chest, I have left you my journals and several notes. I've spent many months researching your condition and I hope that some of this will be useful to you. There's also something else in the chest. During a scouting mission in the Black Rock Mountains, we uncovered this rod. From what I understand, it's quite powerful. There was just no way I could get this to you currently. I do not envy the journey that you have in front of you, but I know that you are capable of overcoming it. Love, Patrick Grace. Okay, well it mentions a condition, so. It doesn't like say it by name though, so I guess she would read it out loud, but at that point, she kind of pauses.
I'd say that she'd read, "In this chest, I have left you my journals and several notes. I spent many months researching," and then she's gonna stop and she's gonna skip the rest of that sentence and then just skip to the rod thing. Like she's not gonna say that she has a condition, but she's gonna read the rest of it out loud to the group. - All right, Phallus is going to kind of place his hands on your shoulder just as like support, 'cause that's twice now that your dad's been brought up. And yeah, that's probably really tough to actually physically go through his things.
- She's gonna reach up and put her tiny hand on his big one and like give it a little squeeze. And then I want that rod, so I'm gonna look for the rod. - Well, you're not seeing- - Just move your hand over. - What? - Sorry. (laughing) - It's a girth, nevermind, it's- - It's a girthy rod. (laughing) - Do me a favor, roll an Arcana check. - Okay, 23. - Jadzi's gonna pick up that there is some sort of magic coming from this chest and she's rifling through letters and journals and she's not seeing anything, but she can sense that it's there. - Okay. - After some rummaging towards the bottom of this chest, she can feel that that's where this is coming from.
And there's a portion of it that sort of slides away. And inside is going to be this black rod etched in red and gold. And that is definitely the source of this power she's picking up on. - Fucking sweet. Can I, now that I found the rod, can I Arcana check the rod to see if I, or history check it or something? - You Arcana, well, history check would be if you're trying to get a background on it. - Okay, I'll do history first, 'cause maybe there's, 'cause I know it's from the Black Rock Mountains, right? That's what the title was. I don't know. 18 for history.
- Jadzi can't recall, Jadzi can't recall any specific knowledge of anything she's read or come across that fits this description. - Okay, now I'll do Arcana. 18, again. - Okay. - There is definitely, this is definitely, what she's picking up is this is definitely much more powerful than what she's currently using. This is, this is some heavy mojo. - Oh, cool. I don't wanna iron hide this, but I also don't wanna galford this. Like there are two extremes of misusing a weapon. I don't want either of them. So like, would I have to go get it appraised to know what it does or?
- Well, I mean, it's still an implement that you're familiar with. You know how to use it. You know that, I mean, you wouldn't have any idea what, I mean, the Rod of Wonder is pretty identifiable. And the first time you use it, you would understand, it's like, oh, this thing is fucking wacky. This, you would assume that this is just your standard rod in terms of how to use it. - Okay, so she's going to take the rod and then I'm not sure how much like room she has in her backpack, but she is going to try to fit everything that was in that chest into her backpack.
- All right, this is going to stuff her pack pretty full. - I have high endurance. - Okay. - Not a lot of strength, but my endurance is pretty good. - So she'd just be crawling through the hallways. - It's gonna suck, but I'm gonna do it. - Valis would obviously tag in. Like he's not gonna watch you. - Hold my books while we go to class, babe. - That's basically what it is. I was just gonna say, Valis has got his letterman jacket on. He's ready to go. Yeah, he's not gonna sit and watch you just struggle. - Thanks, babe, kisses. Okay, so. - That would be pretty much what you guys would find in this room.
- Yay. - I'm guessing you're getting some rest for the night at some point here. - Yeah, Cat, did you wanna go see your family? 'Cause I know you still have brothers alive. - Okay, so these, okay, so the brother that got Fee into the military is dead, so he's no longer around. Fee had a sister and a brother. In addition to the brother from the military. Neither of them are still in the Overwatch. But Fee would want to go back to his house. - Well, we can totally do that. All right, well, let's go to Flo's house. All right, heading to the front door of Flo's house, you don't even need a perception check for this, but you're going to see where a portion of this place is burned down.
It would appear as though that the flames that were started in several locations spread a bit, and Flo's house was one of the ones that got caught in the blaze. Looked like partway through it burning down, it was put out. So a portion of this building looks pretty much untouched while the rest of it is pretty charred. - Okay, so Fee is gonna go in and walk over to some of the charred furniture and just like, sorry. Yes, Fee is gonna go into the house and just go over to a piece of charred furniture and just rub his hand along it. He's gonna stare at the ash on his hand and whisper under his breath, I'm sorry, I caused you so much pain.
And then he's gonna be silent from that point on. But it's quite obvious that he's trying not to cry. - Maybe let's go back and deal with the drow. No? - Guys? - No one wants to do anything. - Thoughts? - Let's go back and deal with the drow. - Yay. - Making decisions. - Wee. - Sounds good. - Let's get away from emotions. - Damn these emotions. - Damn them. - Okay. - So you're letting Liara know that you wanna sit down with these drow. - Yeah. - All right. So. - I think Tatsuya would wanna sit down with the drow. - Do you wanna sit it out? - I think she would, honestly, like character wise. 'Cause like she talked a big talk, she was like, we need to tell them the truth.
But now she looks them in the eye, she's gonna want it when she knows what that means. So I think she would actually, rather than tell them the truth, just not even face them. - By we, I mean you. And by truth. - By we need to tell the truth, I mean, you need to go lie to them and I need to be over here. - Jason, quick question. Is Una pretty positive that she's half drow at this point? - Well, yeah, after the stuff with Seraph and like, that's one of the things, we never actually came out and say it, but both Una and Seraph we both kinda know. - Just put two and two together.
- Kind of put it in your mom. - Yeah. I mean, the fact that you know you have elven blood and you're pretty sure Seraph is your dad, just based on that exchange, you kinda know. - Okay. - Brie is definitely gonna sit in on this with Leora. And unless Una flat out tells her no, Brie is gonna try and sit next to Una during this whole thing. - Aw, hold hands. - No. - I'm not even here, sorry, I'll mute. (laughing) But you're so cute. - Una will tolerate it, she won't say anything. She won't acknowledge it. 'Cause Brie's still playing it like she knows you're pissed, like she knows and she feels terrible.
- I hate when people do that when they know you're pissed, but they pretend that maybe you're not pissed and it's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. - It's not that she's pretending that Una isn't pissed, it's more just there's not much she can do about it. - She's not good nice to me, fucking. - Right. But then sitting away from you is weird too, so it's just. So, Ora is going to walk into the room with four other drow. These drow are pretty armored, not in heavy armor. They're sort of wearing this black leather getup, but they're definitely dressed for combat.
And Ora, go ahead, sorry. - I'll say, Una will bow to Ora when she comes in. - Ora's gonna give this shallow bow back to Una, but keeping eye contact the entire time. You summoned me. - Okay, there's no need to beat about the bush. I'm sorry, I know I promised you that Marcus Sano would be in Overwatch, but unfortunately, like the coward that he was, he fled. He fled to Esterhold, with the pretense of having some orders. And when we were there, there was an altercation, which resulted in his death. - Ora is going to take her-- - Do you want to roll a diplomacy?
- That's not really a diplomacy check, because you're just spewing facts. - Sure, I mean, some of them are a little colorful, but sure. - I mean, you're in, I mean, taking, you're relaying that he's dead, basically, is what I'm saying. - Yeah. - Ora's going to take her fist and just slam it down on the table. Liara's not going to really move. Brie is going to instantly, it's going to make her jump. And in doing so, her hands are going to go white and her eyes are going to go black. She is immediately on the defensive here. - Una's going to like grab her shoulder and push her back down into the chair.
Like, no, sit. - She's going to look over to Una, just, are you sure? Because that's, like, that seems pretty aggressive. Like they're going to do something, but she's going to, she's going to give it a second and then take a few deep breaths and calm down. - Una's going to like look pretty remorseful and look over at Ora and just say, look, I'm aware that you wanted your vengeance and it was due to you. And I am truly sorry for the fact that we took that from you. But he died with the greatest indignity possible. It was pathetic. It was lonely. It was tragic for him.
There was nothing good. There was nothing honorable. He died shitting himself in fear. Is that diplomacy? - That's... - Still kind of factual. - Yeah, no, no, no. It's factual, but what you're using that as is a way to calm her down. - Okay, fingers crossed guys. 27. - Okay. She's going to look back at the people with her and they're going to give just the slightest nod. While that is a minor comfort, you can understand our pent up rage at this situation. We were promised the man responsible for the death of our children. And now we have nothing. - If Marcus had had anyone, anyone who loved him, liked him or tolerated him even remotely, I would send you to them to destroy them like he destroyed your children.
But unfortunately, there is nobody that I can think of who had the slightest emotional connection to him. There is no family you can take your vengeance out upon. Take solace in the fact that at least you have connections with people. Marcus Santa was utterly and disgustingly alone. With his death, he is wiped from this fucking world forever. - She's going to glare at you the entire time you're talking. - Jesus. - Fine. Then I take it our business here is concluded and she's very short. Like you could tell she's very pissed off. There's nothing she could do about this situation, but she is very upset.
And she's looking at Leora when she says that. Leora's gonna speak up and say, you're welcome to stay in the city as long as you like. Ora's gonna stand up and give one last look to Una and the rest of the party here. And then just sort of huff, just ugh. And then she's gonna get ready and turn and walk away. And unless anybody stops her, she is gonna leave this room. - That went a lot better than expected. - So Ora is going to, is gonna leave. And that leaves you guys, leaves you guys here. So Jadzia isn't present. But Leora's gonna ask, is gonna ask Una specifically, but the party.
So have you decided what you wanna do about this troll? Again, if you don't wanna deal with it, we can deal with it in our spare time. He's not doing any harm really. - No, we, and we've accomplished everything we came here to do in a couple hours. We might as well slaughter a troll for you while we're at it. - I have a notion. If you wanted to, you could actually just do it in the arena. We could funnel them to you and you'd have plenty of room to move around. Might be nice for some of these people to witness a little spectacle. I mean, it's not like it's an innocent.
- I don't see a problem with that. I mean, having an audience is always fun, right? - You do realize this is dangerous. You could get hurt. - Oh, no. - I understand it's not a dragon, but it's still a dangerous animal. You might wanna be careful. - Thanks for warning. We can usually handle our shit. - Well, I used to do this for a living and I'm just telling you for fact to watch yourselves, that's all, especially if, and she's gonna look over to Bree. Is Bree going with you? - No. - Bree's gonna speak up yes. - Apparently. - Bree's gonna speak up. Look, I wasn't here for the assault on the city and I wanna help out.
I got my powers back. I mean, I wouldn't be useless. - Una's gonna open her mouth like she's going to say something like, "No, you've done too much already. "You need to rest," or something, but halfway through getting ready to say that, she just kinda, fine. - Bree's gonna glance over to Una and she's gonna open her mouth like she's gonna say something and then just let it go. - Fight me, bitch. No, don't. You're scary. - All right, so I'll get ready and arrange this and we'll put on a show, I guess. Good luck. And Leora's gonna hold her hand out to Una.
- Yeah, I guess, and we'll shake our hand, you know, stiffly. - Jason. Out of character, does all of the group know about the effects of fire on trolls? - I imagine that was something that Kluna would've relayed earlier. - Oh, yeah, yeah. - Okay. - We had a whole spiel about trolls. - Thought so. - Is lightning the same thing as fire? - No. - Damn it. Can lightning start fires? - Well, yeah. - Fi is gonna look at Leora and say, "Fire would probably be quite helpful "in this battle against the troll. "While I don't want to set the arena alight, "is there anything that you may be able to give us "that would assist us in that matter?" - Well, sorry, I don't wanna set the world on fire.
Just popped into my head. I was just saying. (laughing) Fucking fallout. - See, that should be, if Strahd and Amara had came in contact, that should be their song. (humming) - Well, what are you suggesting? We could give you, I mean, we can give you torches, or I mean, what do you need? - Something, I mean, I could probably set light to my arrows, but I don't know how long they would burn for. But apart from that, I don't have anything that would burn. - You know what? I'll tell you what. Hold on a second. And she's going to reach for a piece of parchment and jot down a note.
Why don't you go ahead and give this to our requisitions officer? And she's gonna give you a broad smile while she's telling you. I think he'll have something for you. - Thank you very much. - So do you guys remember who the requisitions officer was? - No. - No. - No. - A man by the name of Sergeant Fletcher. - Honey, we're home! - But he's still alive? - He's absolutely still alive. - Oh, he lived to anything. - Well, part of the perk of being someone who never rises above a certain rank is that you stay indoors. - Was he the ditch digging duty? - No, that was Baker.
- Oh, he was the original one who had us, who was trying to kill us. - Yes. - Ah. - Yes. - I feel like avenging fucking angels coming from hell or some shit. (laughing) - Hey, dude! (laughing) - Walking into Fletcher's office, he is jotting down some things and he is gonna look up and see you walk in. And his face is going to go slack. You have got to be kidding me. - Can someone blow him a kiss? It's not in my character, but can someone blow him a kiss? - You know we'll blow him a kiss. - Sweet, thank you. So I won. - It looks like we're here to disappoint you again.
And he's gonna hand him the note. - He is going to snatch this out of your hand. And as he's, (laughing) so as he's unfurling this, he's not looking at it directly and he's looking at you. I don't see what I could possibly do for any of you, to be honest. I don't even know why you're walking around in the city and not dead. And he is going to, he's unfurling this and looking at it. And you can see him kind of bite down on the absolute bile that wants to come out of his mouth. He just wants to dress you down in front of all these people. And he's just like kind of biting his lower lip.
- And he's gonna say, "Sorry, what was that?" Repeat yourself, please. Can I intimidate? (laughing) - If you're doing it to intimidate him, like you're leaning over the counter, like kind of like you're just like, if you're trying to intimidate him, go right ahead. - 25. - He is going to snap up from what he's reading in the middle of it the first time you address him. And you can tell he wants to say, oh, he wants to say something. And then when he kind of leans into it, and he's gonna take a step back away from his counter. Give me a minute, I'll be right back with your supplies.
And he's going to march off into this little warehouse room. - Did he drop the letter onto the desk? Or is he still holding it? - He's still holding it. - Okay. - He is going to come from the back room and place three small bottles. Separated from each other. And he's going to place them on, you're noticing he's placing them very gingerly. All right. Do you know how these work? - We probably do, honestly. Can we do a check to see if we know how these work? - Do an Arcana check for me. - Sweet. How's a 23 do? - Jadzia knows how these work. This is a very, it's almost nitroglycerin in Theria.
It's almost that. But instead of an explosion, what happens is when they're jostled, normally when they're thrown at something and they burst open, as soon as this makes contact with air, boom, this goes up in flames. Sort of like napalm. It just coats, it's kind of an oil that coats something and it'll just erupt. So if this were to bust in someone's pack, you could be in some fucking problems. So I would handle these with kid gloves. But it's not like you're, yeah. - I was gonna say, look, this sounds like something I can hold. - It's just like old times, guys.
- It's just like we never left. - Okay, so. - Fletcher's gonna look to you. Is there anything else? - Lick my boot. - Jadz, do say that, please tell me you said that. - No. - Out of character. Is there any of the arrows that they were setting light to and firing from the top of the Overwatch walls around? - That is a fairly common thing. It's something they wrap the tips of their arrows in and it's like an oil dip too that they use. So that's something that is pretty common though, if you could get some of that. - Do they have anything I want? - I mean, you have.
- Is holes? - But does she want them? - I mean, they're not gonna have a weapon that's better than yours and they're not gonna have armor that's better than yours. The best you could get is probably explosives, but it's not something you necessarily wanna be carrying around with you all the time. - Yeah. - So during this-- - They have a firework? - Like just like regular ass fireworks? - Yeah. - It wouldn't be in the requisition zone for the military, but they're in the city, sure. - One thing before we like leave, can I insight check these to make sure that they aren't like the shitty ones from the back, they're all wet and don't work anymore?
- Well, it wouldn't be an insight check. You do a perception check to see if they're-- - But my insights better. - You can have someone else roll perception check if you don't want. - But the bottles wouldn't openly be trying to lie to you. - Okay, fair enough, perception. Can I do Arcana 'cause they're magic? - You did do an Arcana. - That's how I found out what they were. That doesn't-- - That would have been in the Arcana check. - Okay, so do they work? 'Cause my Arcana check's 23. I'll take that over any perception roll I could possibly do. - They look to be in fine working order to you.
- Okay, cool. - So during this exchange with Fletcher, Sheldon is going to keep leaping up and try to climb his way to the top of this counter. And every time he does, he's sort of slapping his palm, his sort of like, he's got these webbed like little hands and feet. So he's constantly just kind of, ah, just sort of trying to claw his way up the counter. And he keeps slapping a little closer to these bottles each time he does so. - Can I kick him? - No, no. - You sure can. - Can the, how many bottles did you say there were? - Three. - Can he pick up two of them before they get knocked on the floor?
- They get knocked on the floor, we're dead. - Yeah, exactly. - You will all burn alive, so yeah. Yes, go right ahead. - I'm gonna kick the thing. Do I have to roll for that or can I just kick it? - You can just kick it. - Okay, yeah. - How hard are you kicking? - Una will just plant her boot as hard as you fucking can in its side. - Okay. - Dude, don't kill my demons. - So in mid jump, Sheldon is going to get kicked by Una's boot and just roll over and he sort of makes a noise like, ah, just sort of, sort of that. - It is gonna wipe her boot off on like the side of the counter.
- And Sheldon is going to sort of get up, holding his side and then like limp back over to Jadzia and sort of like wrap himself around Jadzia's heel. Just sort of like, okay, this is home base. You can't touch me in home base. Like it's. - Jadzia's gonna look like she almost feels bad for the thing, but she's not gonna say anything 'cause it was being bad, but she's gonna kind of like pat his head like, fuck you. Little douche. - Valus is gonna give the biggest smile when he sees him do that. He fucking hates this thing. - Seems a little unfair. He hasn't done anything recently.
- It's, it's a- - It's just gross. - Okay, to look at it from Valus's standpoint, this thing gets to enjoy a level of intimacy that Valus doesn't even get to enjoy. He, like this little demon touches you more than he does. - Oh yeah, that's kind of, ugh. Yeah, that's gross and unfair. - Fuck, ew. - I mean, it's not that he wants to be wrapped around his fucking jettiest leg, but at the same time, it's like this little fucker, not to mention a demon has your soul. He's not a big fan of demons. He's always compared to demons. It's just- - You know what that makes me think of?
It makes me think of in "That 70s Show" when the mother got a dog. - Yes. - It was just always around. - So you guys gonna go take on a troll? - Yeah, V wants to grab some of the arrows with the flammable tips as well. - All right, so let's say you got five of those. - Cool. - All right. - All right. Everyone do me a favor, place your icons right in this area here, anywhere in here. - Would, I presume we wouldn't have dailies back, but would we be fully held up? - Let's say that you caught a rest. - Very please here, peoples. - I like these enclosed spaces. - Towards the bottom.
- Does that include dailies? - Yes. - Awesome. So let's have, okay, so you're gathered in the arena and there's a pretty big crowd. Because if there's people, people in the Overwatch love anything, it's senseless murder in the arena. They love that. And especially when there's no moral ambiguity to it, it's just you facing, it's brave adventurers facing the monster. And yeah, word has begun to spread that it's the Crimson Shield, at least to them. Some members of the Crimson Shield. So there are individuals in the city who are sort of rooting for you to die.
So yeah, either way, it's a win for them. So let's have Girth the troll. - Girth. - Oh, Girth. Oh, two Rs, no vowels, I like it. - Yeah, it's very troll-like. - Oh no, why is he there twice? - Oh, because he gets to go twice. - I don't like that as much. - Oh, I rolled, but it didn't. - Cool. - I got 22 for my additional initiative. - Guys, I actually got good initiative for once. - Yay. - I'm having trouble rolling initiative for some reason. - Everyone got 22. - Oh, there we go, six. - Nice. - Oh wow, you crit missed. You're really nervous about this bomb you're holding.
Oh look, Girth gets to go first. Perfect. - Okay, well, hi Girth. Let's see. - Let's just use his name as much as possible. - What did you troll speak? - Troll? - Yeah, they're more, they're not really, it's not really a creature that could be reasoned with very well. - They don't speak goblin, do they? - Not really, no. - Over. - Were you gonna talk him down with the lamp? - Maybe. - That would've been cool. - You never know, could've been neat. Just surrender so we can murder you. Oh man, okay. So, Girth the troll is going to go first. He is going to run forward, and you can feel each one of these steps pound at the arena's floor here.
And as he gets closer, you can feel the ground start to shake. And he is gonna charge at both, Fi and Una. And he is going to try and grab both of you up with his claws at the same time. So first, let's do Una. That is a 28 versus your fortitude. Or AC, sorry. - It's not gonna hit. Oh, it does hit, yep. Damn it, when I see it, it's actually 28. - And then Fi. That is a 33. So let's do damage. 20 damage to both of you. - Shit. - Cool, I got that. - Okay. And you are both grabbed by this troll. So his massive hands, he has scooped both of you up. Next up would be, jeez, okay, Valis.
He is going to move up to the side of this thing and just try to, let's just pop dailies right off the bat. From Hell's Heart, that is gonna hit. 40 damage to this troll. - Hot damn. - Fi, your turn. - Okay, doggy. Okay, so, can, oh, fuck, hang on. (imitates gun firing) Okay, so can I use shallow attenders to teleport behind him? - You should be able to, let me double check the wording on the power. Yeah, you can. - Awesome, so I will teleport there. And I will be using a Melo basic attack with which I also have combat advantage. I'm actually. And I will be using backstab as well.
- Okay. - So, Melo basic, add a plus five. That's a mess. Okay, and can I pop a wild repulsion, which gives me a resist five to all damage. - Okay. - And that's the end of my turn. - All right, Jassy, your turn. - All right, I'm gonna move one, two, three, four, five, six. I'm going to curse Mr. Trollypants. I'm going to activate Hellfire Touch, which means that my hands are going to erupt in flame. The next creature I hit with an attack, actually, you know what? I'm gonna save Hellfire Touch because if he starts to get over the flames, I wanna keep it for later.
I still get speedy though, 'cause I'm talking really fast. I'm gonna use flames of Phygethos after cursing. 'Cause I don't remember if I cursed or not, but I get plus one for thinking speedy, fine. (screams) I was actually really mad. I get to reroll though, I'm gonna use one of my rerolls. - Wow. - Why is it over every time I really think something out though? Have you guys noticed that? - Well, you get a reroll, that is a crit one. - No, but every time I really think something out, it happens. Every time I'm like, yes, this is the one. Crit means every time, okay.
I'm just not even gonna try anymore, this is ridiculous. - The only thing I can say is you'd have that, you'd have the rabbit's foot back by now. That's the only thing I can say. - I got a 20, I'll try it. I'll give. - Well, I got a 25 and I missed, so. - So I'd have to get six. - This versus reflex. - Oh yeah, so I'm gonna, I'll try the rabbit's foot 'cause I'm really mad right now and this is my one really good spell that could really help us out, so contract. Six, hey, 26, yes. You have to cut out that really loud fuck, it may sound like a start, but I mean, it just keeps happening.
Okay, so the effect is the target takes ongoing five fire damage, save ends. And it's this many numbers. 36 damage. - Okay. - And then I also get to roll 46 'cause my new spell thing, when I get cursed, the rod says that I can deal my warlock's curse damage an additional two dice, which is awesome. And I think my thing is two dice now. I gotta go double check that. See how as soon as I got my thinking speedy, I stopped being fast, that's rude. - You do have to recurse him though, he's no longer cursed. - Yes, I'll recurse him next turn. Yes, I get 2D6 plus another 2D6, sweet.
Be good, plus 14. - Okay, 14 damage. Jazzy's gonna feel immense power coming from this rod. - The girth of the rod is so powerful. - God damn it. Kaluna! - My first one to hit. - Okay, I wanna put pig right here. - All right, pig's going there. - And then I wanna use iron breaker claws on the troll. So I'm gonna do that. - Me, fuck you stupid troll. Let's see, I don't think I have anything else to do. Nope. So that's my turn, very successful. - Okay, here's what's gonna happen. Girth is going to get ready and take Una and throw Una at Jadzia. - Okay. I am concealed.
- Okay. 26 versus Jazzy. - I don't get to do anything to check to avoid that. - No, because you're grabbed by him, this is just part of his attack. - What does concealed get me again? - Plus two to your AC. - Okay, so yeah, it's gonna hit. Hi Una. - Hey. - Well, the good news is-- - I can't carry the ring, but I can carry you. - The good news is that, okay, while Jadzia is going to take the brunt of this damage, Una's only gonna take half of this damage. So whatever this-- - Thanks. - 33 damage, so yeah, you're only gonna take half of that. - Nice. - The good news is Una's not hurt, is what you just said.
- Not really hurt. - The person with all the health. - Yeah, you know, the one with 99 health versus the one with 85. - So yeah, that's like 16 damage. - And you're not prone. - I'm assuming both of us. - Yes, both of you. - I don't know how to make a just conditions. Okay, cool. And I did find that menu though, that's cool. I can do that. - Let's see here. He's also gonna take five ongoing fire damage and let me try and save against that now. All right, so he saves against the fire damage, so that's done. - Already? - Sadly, Fi, your turn. - Thank you, if I shift next to Valus, that's pig.
Oh, if I shift one to my right, I should get combat advantage with Bree, shouldn't I? - Yes. - Awesome. Okay, yeah, so I will shift there and I will do a melee basic attack with my backstab again. So that's a plus five. That's a hit, there we go. Okay, so my melee basic damage. - He's not gonna say it. - No, I'm not. It's 16. - You're not allowed to not say it, it's against the rules. (laughing) - And that is my sneak attack. - If you don't say it, then it's minus 10 to all of your rules. - Why would you want that in this fight? - If you don't say it, then Bree won't leave you alone.
Fair enough. - Trust me, that's a bigger concept. (laughing) - Okay, almost a crit. - There we go. - See all this pinky dough is just giving. - See the thing is, I don't look at what I roll, I just look to see whether I hit or not. - Yeah. - Which is why I'd never say it. Okay, so can I activate my deep wounding weapon, which is a daily trigger. You hit an enemy with a melee weapon attack using this weapon, the effect is the target takes ongoing 10 damage, save ends. If the trigger attack was made using an action point, that's irrelevant. But yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, so can I do that to add an additional 10 ongoing damage?
- What is it called again? I'm making sure here. - Deep, deep wounding weapon? - Yeah, it's a daily, so yeah. - It wasn't, so yeah, he takes an additional 10 ongoing damage, save ends. - Okay. - Okay, so that's my backstab used, and that is everything I can do. - All right. That would, come on initiative, that'll bring up Bree. Bree is going to shift over one, and she can't use any of that stuff 'cause that'll kill everyone. She's gonna use overload on the troll. That is almost a crit. That will hit the troll and blam, 42 damage. And she is going to rocket back and slam into this tour.
That'll give five damage to Bree. And she is prone and will have to charge next round. And the troll is now prone as well. Una, your turn. - Okay, I'm gonna use Win Free Assault. My move of action to stand up, Win Free Assault to get over there. Attack the fucker. Miss, shocking. Yeah, I know, surprising. I'm gonna use, oh, should probably move my character. I'm gonna use the miner to throw the nitro stuff on it. - Okay. - That is a miner, right? - It's a miner, but I'm gonna warn you, there's a burst zone that will encompass everyone here. - Oh, I mean, it's not four, it's like 24.
- What? No, no, no, it's just, it's a burst three. So. - Okay, I guess I won't do that then. That's kind of dumb. Action point. - Fire spreads. - Action point? - Sure. - Might as well use reminder distribution. It's really the only one that's gonna do anything. Yeah, reminder distribution. Seriously, what? Can I get a plus 14 to hit? No wonder I'm not hitting any shit. Okay, oh god, AC's probably really high. If I, do I get a plus one for thinking speedy? - You sure do. - Can I also use Lucky Rabbit's Foot? - Oh, well, we were banking on the fact that you gave that back to Jadzia.
- Oh, okay, I didn't. Well, that's cool. - Okay. - I probably did. Well, half damage anyway then. - Okay. - That's not the wrong. Oh, what the fuck am I doing? No, there we go. Fights are so boring. 26 damage. - 26. They're only boring when you don't hit things. - I never hit things. - That's not true. - I never fucking hit things. - You've hit things before. - I feel the same way. - Girth the troll. He is going to stand up. Let's see who's done the most damage to him recently. Okay, everyone get ready 'cause I think there's gonna be some opportunity attacks here. He's gonna get ready and target fee with Troll Push. 'Cause it won't let me do the attack roll for some reason.
Okay. Oh, Jesus Christ. 34 versus your Fortitude fee? - Just a little bit. - Okay. Jesus, okay. - The modifier is two off of my Fortitude. So yes, it. - Good God. Okay. Get ready for this. So the troll pushes the target one square and knocks it prone The troll then shifts one square to the square the target vacated. The ogre can push the target an additional number of squares equal to the ogre's speed, shifting an equal number of squares to the, okay. So you're also gonna take 1d8 damage for each square the ogre, the troll pushes you. So here's, let me describe the scene.
The troll is essentially kicking you and you're going to go back one square. Now let's do damage for that real quick. That's 22 damage. He's then going to shift. Then he's going to kick you again up to his speed. So one, two, three, four, five, six. Well, he couldn't go eight, but you're going into a wall. So that's 1d8 times six. - Bye guys. - 21 damage. - I got you buddy. Oh Jesus. - Now Una is gonna get a, Una and Jets here are both gonna get opportunity attacks. So go ahead and make a melee basic attack against this guy. - Wait, I think I can use my Eldritch Blast as a melee basic too.
Hold up. - Trigger an enemy square adjacent to your spirit companion without shifting. - Oh, he did shift though. That's what he said. - Yeah, he did shift the first time. - That's lame. That counts as a ranged basic. Damn it, do I really have to use like regular melee basic? I'm checking my other one to see if it's mainly basic. Nope, I just have to use my regular melee basic. Ready guys? Ready for this? This is gonna be hilarious. It's a flat d20. (laughing) - I rolled a two, so I set it up pretty well for you. Enjoy. - At least don't look good in comparison, ready?
- Fuck this character. - Holy shit. - You just fucking crit. - Are you fucking kidding me right now? - Wait, wait, what the fuck? His AC is, oh, 'cause it's a crit. - She crit. - Because it's a crit, it doesn't matter. Jadzi just crit a melee basic attack. - This is incredible. This is the best day of my life. - On achievements. - I'm so mad right now. - Fuck off Jadzi, holy shit. - 3d4 plus one guys. - You crit on your fucking melee basic and I can't crit on my biggest daily. Fucking hell. - I crit miss every one of my dailies, but I crit. Okay, here we go. Just take the 13 damage.
You enjoy that 13 damage. Enjoy the flavor of the 13 damage. That's kind of amazing. I'm gonna be honest. - That is pretty, if only I've been able to use like anything else. - God. - My melee basic attack is literally like I poke him. I'm like, meh. - God, he is not gonna save versus the 10 ongoing damage. So he's gonna continue to take that. Valis is going to move one, two, three, four, five, six. - Didn't he have an additional five on that as well? - He saved against that. - Yeah. - Yeah, 'cause I remember Bree saying really already. - I was mad. I'm always mad though, so it's okay.
I still have Hellfire Touch. - Valis is gonna use Fire Step and get on the other side of this troll and it's gonna deal five fire damage to it. And that's gonna be Valis' turn to close that gap. V, your turn. Oh, you're prone too, but that's the least of your worst. - Okay, so move action to stand up. Okay, so move action to stand up and a melee basic attack. - Okay. - That's a hit. - Yes, it is. - Okay, so that's 16 damage. And my sneak attack. And that's 11 damage as well. And that's everything that I can do. - Okay, Jettie, your turn. - Okay, I am going to do the really smart thing here and stand up.
I don't know how to do that myself, so can you stand me up? - I sure can. - And then I'll use the Iron Spike of Dis. Oh, and I'll curse him again, curse. That's what it sounds like when I curse people, it's actually really cursing. - It's not as intimidating as I thought it would be. - Yeah. - That's a hit. - A hit-a-thing. That's new and different. Okay, so that's 3d10 plus Constitution modifier and the target is Immobilize Saved Ends. So if you wanna get out of there, V, then we can start throwing fire shit at him. - Awesome. - That is 41 damage. Oh yeah, and then I also get to do my thing, but I only want two of them now 'cause my Rod is only a daily.
So, and then also my curse is gonna do another eight damage. So it's 49 damage. And he's Immobilize Saved Ends. - Okay. - Sweet. - Immobilize, okay. Kaluna, your turn. Okey-dokey. Oh hey, I said the thing. I feel cool. Okay, so I'm gonna move Pig right here and then I'm gonna use Healing Spirit on Fi. So the target can spend a Healing Surge. If the target does so, one ally adjacent to your Spirit Companion regains 1d6 except for my level it's 3d6 and then because of Fountain of Life, it's 3d8. So there you go. - Yes, cool. - Oh, and also the target of Healing Spirit regains additional HP.
I don't know what the additional HP is. I assume it's my Will modifier or Will thing or Wisdom modifier, not Will. - It doesn't say what additional HP it comes from? - Nope, it just says bigger Spirit. Target of Healing Spirit regains additional HP. - Well, that's not helpful. - Okay, so am I just, what is it? - One Surge. - Yep, one Surge and then I guess additional HPs of some unspecified amount. - Your Wiz, let's use your Wiz mod then. - So six. - Six, awesome. Thank you very much. - Welcome. And... - I heal? I get to heal myself? - You get 3d8 hit points. - Nice.
That's a lot of hit points actually. Where's the d8? One, two, three. Whoa. Fucking sweet, 16. Thank you, honey. - You're welcome. I can heal sometimes. - Just in, yeah. Look at me go. - And that's my turn. - Okay, Girth's turn. I'm just gonna take 10. It's never gonna get old. - Girth. (laughs) - He's gonna take 10 right off the bat. - It doesn't look like he's immobilized. Did he save against it? You didn't leave one. - I'm so sorry. I saw the yellow thing and I thought I automatically did. I did, I'm on it though. It's okay. - Okay, let me say so. - He is going to, he's gonna use Claw again and reach out and try and grab both Valus and Fi.
- And Valus, that's gonna miss Fi. That's gonna, two crit ones. - Two crit ones in a row. It's not just us guys. - Incredible. Izzy, I wanna pitch something to you, okay? So on your turn, all I want you to do is move right there. - Wait, what, where? - Right here. Because then on my turn, I can give you a charge attack and you'll get up to him and you can do extra damage. I mean, I can get up to him anyway. - Well, yeah, but this way you can do a charge attack. - But that means I have to wait around a whole turn and not do anything. - You could throw your hand on it.
- The only thing with a charge attack is you can do, you have to do a melee basic attack at the end of it. - Well, there's an extra one D10 extra damage. - Oh, okay. - I mean, sure, why the fuck not? I'm not doing anything anyway. - My basic attacks are doing so well. - My basic attacks are baller, so we can just do that. It's totally in John Cena's character, charged straight at the troll. If we can free up the three by three, like if Kat could just move a little, then we can throw the fire there and it can hit the troll and not anyone else because he is currently pinned down.
So it's a thing, in case anyone's interested. - Yeah. - You're sitting fire to him? - Well, you guys have those bombs that were three by three and you couldn't use them. Now he's pinned. If we can clear out a three by three area, we can use the bombs. - Back up P. - Yep, providing an idea. - I'm trying. - Oh, is it my turn now? - P, your turn. - Yep. - Okay. Trying not to get... Oh, I know, hold on, hold on, hold on. Okay, so, melee basic attack against the troll. Plus two for combat advantage with Valus. That's a miss. Okay, so action point. When I use my action point before or after my action, I can teleport up to my speed.
Is it my speed or is it five? Five squares is a free action. So I'm... Okay, so Jason, I haven't... - You used an action point, didn't you? - Not in this fight. - I'm pretty sure you did actually earlier. Does anyone else remember this? I remember Una talked about using an action point, so it could have been Una, sorry. - I was just trying to keep that straight. It was a long ass gap, so, okay, got. - Okay, yeah, so, okay, I missed my melee basic attack. Action point, which will get me a teleport for five squares. So one, two, three, four, five. And just a ranged basic attack.
Can I use my miner to set one of these arrows on fire? On fire to him. Is he on fire at the moment or? - No, he's not on fire. - Yeah. - He did... Actually, Valis did, no, he teleported to get there, so that did five fire damage. That's 10 ongoing. So he is on fire. - Oh, okay, fair enough. - Wait, he had 10 ongoing before he teleported, though, so that's-- - That's 10 ongoing regular damage, yeah. - Okay, so now there's 20 ongoing. - Yes. - It still says 10. - Okay, well, ranged basic attack. Is a hit. And I just get the damage because I don't have combat advantage. 13.
- Okay, 13 damage. - That's everything. - Brace turn, she's got a charge, so five. Oona, your turn. - Okay, I will just scooch on over to here. - I think that's good, right? That'll give a charge. - Are we setting fire to him, though? 'Cause we're setting fire to him. - Oh, yeah, will it make a line, bleh. Will it make a space of fire or... - Because if I charge, I have to be right next to him. - Does it just do a splash? Yeah, I'm just, I'm asking about the fire. Does it leave a fire area or does it just-- - Yeah, this will be, yeah, it'll be a fire area. - Okay, fuck, just kidding.
- He is on fire, though, currently. - Okay, so. - Okay, fuck that, then. - Yeah. - If I throw the fire thing at him, he'll take more fire damage, right? - Well, yeah. - Okay, I'm gonna pop my miner for wind step, what? - If you've put it right there, it won't hurt Valus. If you put it here or here, it's verse three, so it won't hurt Valus if you do those two spots, just so you know. I was trying to figure this out, 'cause usually we can't get Valus to move on the battlefield, like he never figures anything out. - He does have fire resist, though, he's fine.
- Fire resist five, we don't know how much these are gonna do. - I don't care, no. Okay, so I've got eight fly speed. Can I throw it if I'm here? - Yeah. - Okay, I will use my, I guess, standard then to throw it there. There, right? - Okay. - That will hit you, it's verse three. - Yeah. - Okay, there. - That would hit Valus, you could do it right there, right there, not square, that little squip right there, and then you wouldn't hit anybody. - It's not really a square. - I'll do this one. - It's a corner. - Fuck Valus. - I'm trying. - So let's section that off here, okay.
Do me a favor, roll two attacks, one against Valus, one against the troll, it's a D20 plus 15 versus fortitude. Yeah, I don't know why the area affected that. Okay, that's okay, so that'll hit the troll and Valus, that'll hit the Valus too, okay. Do me a favor, roll five D8s please. - Yeah, his five resist is gonna be really helpful here. - It actually will. - Yeah, that was kind of shitty. There's two ones, a two and a four. Oh, and a three. (Caitie coughing) - Hey, is that ongoing though? Will that fire stay? - It'll be 20 ongoing if he stays in it. - He has to.
- Yeah, so he's taking 40 ongoing damage. - Right now. - Jesus Christ, okay. - This shit stacks. - Anything else on him? - Sorry, I was coughing. No, I think I'm about done. I'm pretty much out of moves anyway. Okay, so that's 40 damage to the troll. He's going to swipe at Valus here and try and scoop him up, that will miss. He's gonna pop his action point, do it again. That will hit. 33 damage to Valus. Valus's turn. He's gonna try and use twist the knife on this troll. That'll miss right out of the gate, shit. - Okay, your turn. - Okie dokie. Looks like I can use my ranged basic.
So okay, so tactical. Tactical trick will get me there and it will get me combat advantage because Valus is next to it. And just a ranged basic attack with combat advantage. That's a hit. So that's damage 11 and my sneak attack is 12. There you go. And that is everything that I can do. - Jazzy, your turn. - Okay, I am going to move. Shocking, I know, one, two, three, four, five, and I'll actually stick to five, but I still get concealment. He is bloodied. Should I activate all? I have enough hit points, I'll use Hellfire Touch. I have to consider that one 'cause it's like, ah, it'll hurt me if I don't hit, but.
And then I will use Hunger of Hater, I think, which is a burst one within 10 squares. So I'm gonna pick this square right here, so that'll be all that. It's so pink and beautiful. Let's see what happens 'cause it'll probably just miss. We'll see, come on. Miss, he has high fort. That's all I can say about that. I think there is a, the burst creates a zone of darkness until the end of the next turn, blocking line of sight. Creatures that enter start their turns in the zone, take 2D10 necrotic damage. I think that happens anyway, 'cause it creates a zone. Yeah, it's effect.
- Yeah, that happens anyway. - And then I target each person in the square and it might hit, but it didn't. But that's the thing that happened is now he gets 2D10 necrotic damage each turn. 'Cause I thought he wasn't getting enough damage each turn, so I just wanted to make sure that that joke died in my mouth. (gagging) - I gotta roll saving throws for Girth too, I forgot. So one, he didn't save against first ongoing damage, fire damage he's not gonna save against, and the other one he's not gonna save against either. So he's still, yeah, he's still immobilized and taking a shitload of, yeah.
Kaluna, your turn. - Okay, so what I'm gonna do. So you only take the fire damage if you stay in the area, right? Not if you go into it. - Well, if you go into it, you're taking it. - Well, shit. - It's fire. - Dick mongers. - Dick mongers. - I don't really have things that I can, oh, you know what I can do? I can heal people. I'm stupid. - Wait, why does it keep doing that? - Okay, so I'm gonna just have Pig scoop right here. And then I'm gonna use Healing Spirit on Una. - Thank you. - So that's, you use a healing surge plus six. And then- - Another thing where I get to use two surges, right?
- I have no idea. - Yeah. - And then Fi, you get 3d8 hit points. - Oh, awesome. - Should I roll that? - Calluna, roll it. - Okay. - And roll. - 12, thank you very much. - You're welcome. And that's my turn. - Let's see, Troll takes 40 off the bat. He is going to Hurl Valis at Chazia, which will hit. - Of course it will. - 28 damage and Valis is gonna take 14. - I do kind of find it funny that Una did more damage to me than Valis did. (laughing) I mean, I'm sure the hammer adds some heft, I'm just saying. Una's tiny and my boyfriend is coughing. The Pokemon, obviously.
(dice clattering) Saving throws, save, doesn't save, saves. Okay, so he's no longer immobilized and he's only taking 30 damage on going guys, so. - Oh, good. - Send me that fire? - Yes. - Cool. - Fi, your turn. - Okey dokey. - Oh, wait, did he roll the 2d8 necrotic damage, by the way? - Oh, Jesus, no. - Yeah. Sweet. Eight more. - That will kill the troll. - Yes! - God damn. - Victory. - Sweet. - Oh, that was beautiful. - That, ladies and gentlemen, is how you dispatch a troll. - Watch out, it's so hard, it's so tough, it's gonna be such a struggle. - Go down and throw fire at it.
- Just hold it down as you pour fire into its mouth, that's basically what you do. - Fire cannot kill a dragon. - But it can kill a troll. - Yes. - Valus is gonna look over to Una, 'cause he's a little pissed off at her, 'cause she threw fire at him. And while he does have a resistance to fire, it's still kind of a fuck you. - That was a little bit rude, Una. - Hey, hey, it killed the fucking troll, okay? - No, I killed the troll. - Well, it helped kill the troll. - Take credit for my hunger, Odor. - Take credit for my hunger. - Odor. - Does that count as a notable kill?
- Do I get that? - Skrth the troll, it was a named troll, so, Skrth. Guys, I think that's a pretty good time for us to stop for the day. - Yep. - All right. - I really got it to work. - Yeah, we've been on for a while. Thanks guys, that was a lot of fun. I liked killing trolls with you and Skrth. - Yeah, that was fun, that was fun. - I liked using my character right for once. - You did a good job. You did a perfect job. - I'll see you guys later. - Bye everyone. - Bye.